ARE YOU A LATINO? HOW CAN YOU TELL IF YOU ARE A LATINO?

[Katwoman]

1) If you have ever been hit by a chancleta.

2) If you grew up scared by something called "El Cuco."

3) If others tell you to stop screaming when you are really just talking.

4) If you light a candle to Virgin Mary on the night of the lotto drawing.

5) If you use your lips to point something out.

6) If you constantly refer to cereal as "con fleys".

7) If your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you for dinner, even if it's a one bedroom apartment.

8) If you can dance merengue, cumbia, or salsa without music.

9) If you use "manteca" instead of olive oil and can't figure out why your butt is getting bigger.

10) If you call your sneakers "tenis".

11) If you have at least thirty cousins, not including loco Julio working at "Don Pipo's".

12) If you can't imagine anyone not liking spicy food.

13) If you are in a five passenger car with seven people in it and a person is shouting "subanse, todavia caben!"

14) If whenever you feel under the weather, you compulsively dab on some "vapor rub" all over your chest and inside your nostrils.

15) Your mom packs your "lonchera" every day even though you've just turned thirty-two.

16) If you call the North Americans "gringos", including Canadians, and call all Asian people "chinos".

17) If you just don't get tired of the so called "sopitas".

18) If you don't think Jennifer Lopez is hot, "she's just another bitch with luck".

19) If your favorite heroes were "El Chapulin Colorado", or "Cantinflas".

[Gringo in CR]

Usted son ticos?


Esto es para compartir con todos ustedes los aspectos
que conforman nuestra idiosincrasia costarricense, y
también para que cada uno se auto evalúe y tome un poco
más de conciencia del nicho que ocupa en nuestra
sociedad.
Que los disfruten y aprendan bastante.


USTED SABE QUE ES TICO SI:

Culpa a los ricos de su situación económica.
Culpa a los pobres del crimen.
Culpa a los liberacionistas y a los mariachis por casi
todo lo demás.
Culpa a los "hijueputas gringos" por todo el resto.
Tiene más fe en un asaltante que en un policÃ*a.
Tiene más fe en un policÃ*a que en un sacerdote.
Tiene más fe en el alcalde que en el presidente.
Disfrutas tomar cerveza en cantidades industriales y
siempre es un buen momento o hay un buen pretexto para
echarse una.
El lunes es para la goma; el martes las muchachas no
pagan; el miércoles hay 2 x 1; el jueves es un viernes
chiquitito; el viernes es de party; el sábado es de
baile, y el domingo es de antes, durante y después del
fútbol.
Come tostadas, mondongo, morcilla, chicharrones,
etc.... pero cree que las hamburguesas no son
saludables.
A todos les llama "compa", "primo", "compadre"... pero
a su verdadero hermano, le llama "playo".

USTED SABE QUE ES LIMONENSE SI:

Considera normal andar armado.
Pasa por chepe en su Nissan Sunny modelo 72, con el
radio a todo volumen con música ragga y cada vez que
acelera hace un escándalo para que crean que su carro
es muy rápido.

USTED SABE QUE ES GUANACASTECO SI:

Habla como nica.
Dice "pa", y todo los años sufre porque la choza se le
inunda ahÃ* por Filadelfia y Belén.
Dice que va para La Capital cuando va para Chepe.
Cree que Chepe es una cuidad grande.

USTED SABE QUE ES CARTAGINÉS SI:

Te crees "moderno" porque hablas de "vos".
Es excepcionalmente supersticioso.
Cree que Cartago podrÃ*a ser capital y cada año que va
a ser campeón.
Dice que el TEC es mejor que la U.

USTED SABE QUE ES ALAJUELENSE SI:

Cuando le preguntan que donde vive dice: en La Liga.
Siempre que tiene la oportunidad aclara que el
aeropuerto internacional esta en Alajuela y no en SJO
como dice en todos los tiquetes de avión.
Tiene un palo de mangos en el patio del chante.
Si viene de por ahÃ* por San Ramón, Palmares o Grecia
habla como el Chunche.
Cree que Alajuela es una cuidad grande e independiente
aunque tenga que irse en lata todos los dÃ*as para la U
en chepe y pasen la mitad del año sin agua y sin
drenaje de aguas negras.

USTED SABE QUE ES PUNTARENENSE SI:

Se autodenominan El Puerto.
Cree que El Puerto va a volver a ser campeón algún dÃ*a
(¡por favor!).
Va de vacaciones a Chepe.
Hace excursiones familiares para ir a ver los
cruceros.

USTED SABE QUE ES HEREDIANO SI:

Se cree mejor que los del resto del paÃ*s y le tiene
lástima con asco a los de San José.
Dicen que son la cuidad de las flores.
Se enorgullece de El Palacio de los Deportes.
Los Domingos va a comprar helados de sorbetera a San
JoaquÃ*n.

USTED SABE QUE ES SAN JOSEFINO SI:

Insulta y se burla de los que no viven en chepe.
Va de paseo al puerto como gran cosa.
Si es liguista dice que el equipo de La Liga es
realmente de San José pero que fue un error. y que
Saprissa es de Nicaragua.

[Ivan Cherkanov]

1) You clap when the plane lands

2) You get in the elevator, before letting he other people off the elevator...

Just too funny for being so true!!!! LMFAO!!! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Gringo,

That's the single most hillarious post I have read in quite a long while. Posted by a 'gringo'???? ROFLMFAO!!!!! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif Too bad it is in tico spanish, so it really makes no sense to translate it, for others to read. But it should be the "latino post of the weeek" /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>1) You clap when the plane lands <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Or when you stop by Mickey D's right before catching a plane, so you can get something to go to take 'en el avion'!!!!

????????? This is too f u c k i n g funny...!!!!! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

[Katwoman]

The ideal Sunday is to stand on the outside of the airport, eat a "copo" and watch the planes land!!! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

[Gringo in CR]

Walk, I've been here so long (5 years) I'm almost a tico /infopop/emoticons/icon_smile.gif

[JessWondrin]

"2) You get in the elevator, before letting he other people off the elevator... "

Or you wait 10 minutes to get on the elevator to go down one floor and go all the way to the top before coming back down to your floor to get off.

[Ivan Cherkanov]

3) You leave the wax on your car for three days to get a better shine.
4) You have a CD hanging from the rear view mirror.
5) You SPEED UP to a red light to ensure the guy at the trying to get out of the gas station must wait.
6) You get sensitive when us uhhhhh, United States citizens, call ourselves Americans, but you have no problems calling us "Gringos" (Racist), and all Asians are "Chinos" (Racist).

[kaya man]

Just curious,

I kind of look at "Gringo" as racist only depending on the intonation the speaker uses since nobody really knows where the word actually comes from any way.

It bothers me more when a latino corrects my saying I'm American as "No, you're North American". I'm not Canadian or Mexican!

What do you think?

I just read this to my mother (who is Cubana) and she really cant stop laughing. LMFAO!!!

[Katwoman]

It is really funny, what made laugh the most was the chancleta thing! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Seriously. I found that the funniest of them all too! My mother used to throw her dusty chancletas at me all the time.


I dont know where you are from, but it is Wednesday night here in New York City. Lotto drawings are every Wednesday and Saturday. I have my $30,000,000 ticket and my Virgin Mary on hand. Wish me luck (seriously!).

[Katwoman]

little late to wish you luck, but I hope you lit some "velitas" (candles) for the lotto and won some money. If you did, send me some!!!! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

Two numbers on a $20 Quick pick. Shit out of luck. Maybe I'll try Santeria next time! LMFAO!

[Katwoman]

LMFAO!!!!! santeria should work, try voodoo also! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

[Gringo in CR]

Kaya, the word "gringo" comes from the Mexican vs US war. Since the North Americans were dressed in green, the Mexican used to say, "green go home". As they said this quickly it became, gringo. Hence the name, gringo.

So in it's origin it was definately used in a derogatory manner. But ticos do not use it as an insult.

[kaya man]

I was waiting for someone to throw that one out there. That explanation makes perfect sense except for the fact that the U.S. soldiers wore blue at that time.

Others say it's because our money is green and so the Mexicans said "Green go".

The thing is that the word at actually dates much further back. Websters dictionary says it comes from the alteration in Spanish of a Greek word with a Latin root. Here's a paste direct from Webster.com

Etymology: Spanish, alteration of griego Greek, stranger, from Latin Graecus Greek
Date: 1849

The word Gringo also appears in Spain around the time of the inquisitions, it was used to refer to Irish Monks living in Spain that could not pronounce Spanish correctly.
The etymology of the word is still considered to be a mystery by most.

That's why I said it all depends on the intonation, and to say flat out, Ticos don't use it as an insult, is incorrect. Some do some don't there's racism everywhere. I've heard it used in a racist sense first hand, many times as a matter of fact over the last eleven years. All the Che Guevara and communism fans here definately use it derogatorily.

[Elusive Carrot]

You bring 40 relatives to the airport to see you off

WOW!!! Finally I know. Tonite I will sleep tight, with my curiosity satisfied.

BTW, are you gringo? /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

[kaya man]

I never know if you're being serious or sarcastic.
To your question, yes.

[LOBSTER]

You forgot to say it's a 2 day trip and at least 90% of the relatives you haven't seen in over a month!!!

/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

I prefer to be called a stinkin Gringo.

LMFAO!!!! Now I remember why you were missed.

Kaya Man,

I'm always serious 'bout what I say, unless I'm not /infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif

[kaya man]

Kinda like me, I tell the truth except when I lie.

[kaya man]

You call
Pepsi - Peksi
pizza - piksa

You honk your horn at every female pedestrian you see.

You drink your beer with ice.


BTW I'm wondering if Gringo in CR read my response to his misconception on the word gringo, I didn't see any answer.

[Dmoneysports.com]

You wear lip liner without lipstick ;-)

Dmoney

[Katwoman]

wanna know what I saw one of these days??? black lip liner and red lipstick!!! /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif and I'm not kidding!!!!

Why do I think I might like that look?

[Katwoman]

Are you serious??? /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif /infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif

[apuestas]

You are sure that drinking soft drinks with ice is the principal cause of respiratory illness.

You make the sign of the cross while the airplane takes off and before commencing clapping when the airplane lands.

[Come on!!!!]

Don't forget being able to say at least 8 of your "apellidos"... or if you ever tried to hook up with someone and he/she turned out to be the son/daughter of your mother's second cousin's niece... meaning, "family" http://theprescription.infopop.net/infopop/emoticons/icon_eek.gif! wich bring us to the fact that you know you're costarican if you consider "family" people wich relation with you is beyond the six degrees...

[This message was edited by A Lady Passing by on May 10, 2003 at 01:32 PM.]

[corey]

Forgive me for not following the thread, but my annswer for how to tell if you are Latino..

1) You can'tdrive worth a sh*t
2) You can't drink worth a sh*t (just kidding)
3) You can't fuc* worth a shit.

especially number 1.

[Judge Wapner]

Obviously #3 does not apply to Latinas.

[linx]

I just wanted to transalate the tico post and maybe get somebody to post here how do you know you are not a redneck here.
This it is to share with all you the aspects that conform our costa rican idiosyncrasy, and also so that each
one itself can evaluate and take a little more than conscience of the niche that occupies in our society.
I hope you enjoy them and learn enough.



YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE TICO IF:



Blame the rich of its economic situation.
Blame the poor of the crime.
Blame the liberacionistas, and the mariachi musicians for almost all the rest.
Blame to the "hijueputas gringos" for all the remainder.
Has more faith in an assailant than in a police.
Has more faith in a police than in a priest.
Has more faith in the mayor than in the president.
Enjoys to take beer in industrial quantities and is always a good moment or there is a good pretext to have one.
Monday is for the rubber; Tuesday the girls do not pay; Wednesday there is 2 x 1; Thursday is a Friday chiquitito; Friday is for the party; on Saturday is of dance, and on sunday is of before during and after the soccer.
It eats tostadas, mondongo, morcilla, chicharrones, etc. ... but believes that the hamburgers are not healthy.
To all it calls "compa", "prime", "compadre"... but to its true brother, calls it "bitches".



YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE LIMONENSE IF:



It considers normal to walk armed.
It passes for chepe in its Nissan Sunny model 72, with the radio volume all the way up with music ragga and each time that accelerates does a scandal so people thinks that its car is very quick.



YOU KNOW THAT you ARE GUANACASTECO IF:

Speaks as nica.
It says "pa", and every year suffers because the hut is flooded it there by Filadelfia and Bethlehem. It says that it goes to The Capital when it goes to Chepe. It
Believes that Chepe is a big city.

YOU KNOW THAT you ARE CARTAGINÉS IF:

You believe yourself "modern" because uses "vos". on his speeches.
Is exceptionally superstitious.
It believes that Cartago could bethe capital and each year that his homwtown soccer team is going to be champion.
It says that the TEC is better than the U.



YOU KNOW THAT you ARE ALAJUELENSE IF:

When they ask it that where it lives it says: in La liga.
Provided opportunity clarifies that the international airport is in Alajuela and not in SJO as says in all the tiquetes of airplane. Has a mangos tree in the patio of the house.
If it comes from San Ramón, Palmares or Greece speaks like the Chunche(an old soccer player).
It believes that Alajuela is a big and independent city although have to take a tin plating every dayto go to the university(U) in chepe and spends half of the year without water and without black drainage of water.



YOU KNOW THAT you ARE PUNTARENENSE IF:

They called themselves The Port.
It believes that The Port is going to return to be champion some day (¡please!)
Goes to Chepe on holidays.
It does family excursions for be going to see the cruisers.



YOU KNOW THAT you ARE HEREDIANO IF:

It is believed better than the of the remainder of the country and has pity with nausea to those of San José.
They say that are the city of the flowers.
They`re proud of El Palacio de los deportes.
On Sundays it goes to buy ice creams of
sorbetera to San JoaquÃ*n.



YOU KNOW THAT you ARE SAN JOSEFINO IF:

It insults and mocks of the ones that do not live in chepe. travel to the port as great deal.
If it is liguista says that the team of LA LIGA is actually from San José but that was an error.
And that Saprissa is from Nicaragua. http://theprescription.infopop.net/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

[corey]

<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Judge Wapner:
Obviously #3 does not apply to Latinas.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Too true, my mistake. #3 only applies to latinos (so the latinas tell me http://theprescription.infopop.net/infopop/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif)