You need to get your balls ironed like George Clooney...
http://nymag.com/thecut/2013/06/ball-ironing-a-cosmetic-procedure-for-men.html
When an Italian magazine asked George Clooney about plastic surgery, he recently joked, "I never fixed my eyes, but I spent more money to stretch the skin of my testicles. I did not like wrinkles. It's a new technique, many people in Hollywood have done it. It's called 'ball ironing.'" And now, proving that Poe's law also applies to Hollywood vanity, a Santa Monica spa is offering a "Tighten the Tackle" procedure.
