Dudes,
Nice 5-2-1 hit last week, however the Leg Spreader opted for the electric rattlebone to get the job done instead of us, effectively going down by 1 point because the Tampons did what they have done seemingly all year, give the pig up to the other team. In fact, the other loss was the non-cover by the Browns by 2 points. Therefore a mere 3 points was the difference is the undefeated Sunday. Still profitable though and not enough to bitch about. These winnings went towards a great cause, Victoria's Secret gift cards, Victoria's Secret perfumes, and gas cards for all my girlfriends. If they look good, smell good and such, it was critical on my part to make sure they had fuel in their tanks to come over for the evening right?
Now, we all know when we go to the strip joints, it's our jovial way for the celebration of women. Since we all have our own tastes that come in as many flavors as a Baskin Robbins menu, it's the situational aspect of it all that lays the framework for these beauties. As you all know by know, metaphorically speaking, I'm always making distinct correlations between situational aspects of real life and NFL capping, it gets me high. Adding to this framework is the systematic approach with the lines which is loaded onto the pork sword and tightly inserted into The Meat Vendor database. Breast of all, week 17 is stuffed fuller than one of Jennifer Love Hewitt's bras for these puppies. Speaking of which, why hasn't this prude flapped those flappers in a movie yet?
So to recap, situational scenarios are when you're at the club with multiple chicks and the alcohol flows, if you're like me, you'll get lucky. Systematic ones are when you have a cougar coming over for the evening and you already know what the end result is going to be, you will be on your back as this temptress morphs into a professional that would rather fuck than breathe, so look out.
Was there any doubt that Clemson and Bama would roll yesterday? C'mon...let's just eliminate the other 130 teams or so out there in the land and let them play each other every week on a neutral field.
Lots of action today, so let's get started...
9 units Los Angeles Rams -10 (Leg Spreader Play of the Week)
8 units Cincinnati/Pittsburgh under 45
7 units Cleveland Browns +7
7 units Green Bay Packers -7.5
6 units Buffalo Bills -5
5 units Indianapolis Colts -4
4 units Chicago Bears +6
3 units Los Angeles Chargers -7
3 units Cleveland/Baltimore over 40.5
Couple of notes here, the Rams need a win to secure a first round bye against a shitty 49ers team, and they have the fire power even without Gurley to grab the cash for us. The total in the Shittsburgh game is not to be underestimated here, the Steelers grab the straight up win, but can't see the Bengals doing much on offense against a pissed off Steeler team that needs a win. The new Browns against the old Browns, this line in a bit inflated according to my numbers because Baltimore must win here. Also Baker will be slinging the pig against a staunch defense in Baltimore, no way the Browns win by running Chubby up the middle, expect points here in Maryland. The Packers want to go out with a win at home to prove to the doubters of Rodgers that he's still going to be the man in Green Bay next year against a Lions team that may lose their coach tomorrow and possibly Stafford next year. It's the dome team playing outdoors in the dead of winter against a highly motivational squad in the Cheeseheads. The Bills are the dark horse of the second half as there is no incentive left in Miami to go to New York and compete today. The Chargers...revenge here and a first round bye on the slate. Kansas City wins today, but I really question their weeks ahead without running back Hunt, it just appears team chemistry has been muffed here. The Bears should keep this one close if they don't pull out an outright today. Finally, Luck is a perfect 10-0 against the Tits, should be 11-0 by midnight tonight.
As always my fellow regulators and overseers of chest muffins, keep it crispy,
Best of Luck,
Eddie Rebel
Nice 5-2-1 hit last week, however the Leg Spreader opted for the electric rattlebone to get the job done instead of us, effectively going down by 1 point because the Tampons did what they have done seemingly all year, give the pig up to the other team. In fact, the other loss was the non-cover by the Browns by 2 points. Therefore a mere 3 points was the difference is the undefeated Sunday. Still profitable though and not enough to bitch about. These winnings went towards a great cause, Victoria's Secret gift cards, Victoria's Secret perfumes, and gas cards for all my girlfriends. If they look good, smell good and such, it was critical on my part to make sure they had fuel in their tanks to come over for the evening right?
Now, we all know when we go to the strip joints, it's our jovial way for the celebration of women. Since we all have our own tastes that come in as many flavors as a Baskin Robbins menu, it's the situational aspect of it all that lays the framework for these beauties. As you all know by know, metaphorically speaking, I'm always making distinct correlations between situational aspects of real life and NFL capping, it gets me high. Adding to this framework is the systematic approach with the lines which is loaded onto the pork sword and tightly inserted into The Meat Vendor database. Breast of all, week 17 is stuffed fuller than one of Jennifer Love Hewitt's bras for these puppies. Speaking of which, why hasn't this prude flapped those flappers in a movie yet?
So to recap, situational scenarios are when you're at the club with multiple chicks and the alcohol flows, if you're like me, you'll get lucky. Systematic ones are when you have a cougar coming over for the evening and you already know what the end result is going to be, you will be on your back as this temptress morphs into a professional that would rather fuck than breathe, so look out.
Was there any doubt that Clemson and Bama would roll yesterday? C'mon...let's just eliminate the other 130 teams or so out there in the land and let them play each other every week on a neutral field.
Lots of action today, so let's get started...
9 units Los Angeles Rams -10 (Leg Spreader Play of the Week)
8 units Cincinnati/Pittsburgh under 45
7 units Cleveland Browns +7
7 units Green Bay Packers -7.5
6 units Buffalo Bills -5
5 units Indianapolis Colts -4
4 units Chicago Bears +6
3 units Los Angeles Chargers -7
3 units Cleveland/Baltimore over 40.5
Couple of notes here, the Rams need a win to secure a first round bye against a shitty 49ers team, and they have the fire power even without Gurley to grab the cash for us. The total in the Shittsburgh game is not to be underestimated here, the Steelers grab the straight up win, but can't see the Bengals doing much on offense against a pissed off Steeler team that needs a win. The new Browns against the old Browns, this line in a bit inflated according to my numbers because Baltimore must win here. Also Baker will be slinging the pig against a staunch defense in Baltimore, no way the Browns win by running Chubby up the middle, expect points here in Maryland. The Packers want to go out with a win at home to prove to the doubters of Rodgers that he's still going to be the man in Green Bay next year against a Lions team that may lose their coach tomorrow and possibly Stafford next year. It's the dome team playing outdoors in the dead of winter against a highly motivational squad in the Cheeseheads. The Bills are the dark horse of the second half as there is no incentive left in Miami to go to New York and compete today. The Chargers...revenge here and a first round bye on the slate. Kansas City wins today, but I really question their weeks ahead without running back Hunt, it just appears team chemistry has been muffed here. The Bears should keep this one close if they don't pull out an outright today. Finally, Luck is a perfect 10-0 against the Tits, should be 11-0 by midnight tonight.
As always my fellow regulators and overseers of chest muffins, keep it crispy,
Best of Luck,
Eddie Rebel
