I know a lot of guys who will simply not lend money to anyone. they say, and with good reason, that it is a sure way to lose a friend, and a better way to put yourself in debt as most debts never get paid back. I always seem to lend out too much money, and i usually don't get paid back. Should I limit loans to only family? Does anyone here have advice on where to draw the line? Should I never lend money to a fellow gambler? Please help.
You should never lend money, u should give money to charity or charity cases. The nature of the beast is someone u lend money too is desperate enough to have to ask their friends\family for money... 99% of the time they look at the money as a respite from their problems and not a step towards the right direction. If u are lending money to gambling friends ur a damn fool.
I dont lend money. I give it away.
I tell the person Im giving the bones too just to keep it. "Just keep it and if your ever in a position to pay it back, then go for it, if not, no biggie"
Of course I dont just toss loot out the window. We're talking family members in a pinch (non gambling ones LOL) and families that I know of that are hurting.
Loaning loot will surely lose you pals. Just give it away or dont do it at all.
I tell the person Im giving the bones too just to keep it. "Just keep it and if your ever in a position to pay it back, then go for it, if not, no biggie"
Of course I dont just toss loot out the window. We're talking family members in a pinch (non gambling ones LOL) and families that I know of that are hurting.
Loaning loot will surely lose you pals. Just give it away or dont do it at all.
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Kev:
I dont lend money. I give it away.
I tell the person Im giving the bones too just to keep it. "Just keep it and if your ever in a position to pay it back, then go for it, if not, no biggie"
Of course I dont just toss loot out the window. We're talking family members in a pinch (non gambling ones LOL) and families that I know of that are hurting.
Loaning loot will surely lose you pals. Just give it away or dont do it at all.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
Good advice.
I dont lend money. I give it away.
I tell the person Im giving the bones too just to keep it. "Just keep it and if your ever in a position to pay it back, then go for it, if not, no biggie"
Of course I dont just toss loot out the window. We're talking family members in a pinch (non gambling ones LOL) and families that I know of that are hurting.
Loaning loot will surely lose you pals. Just give it away or dont do it at all.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
Good advice.
I almost lost a good friend just talking about the topic. He asked me theoretically what I would do if my best friend lost all his money gambling and needed a loan to get back in the game. I told him I would apply the same philosophy to him as to myself according to which it's his fault he has no money so it's his job to solve his woes, not mine. If that means getting some crappy job for a while then so be it.
He then pointed out that I'm not really a good friend if I can't be relied on to help in a time of need. Then I corrected him by showing a number of examples when I would be more than happy to help out like unexpected illness, girl problems etc. In those cases I would have no problem giving some $$$ but I would certainly not expect him to give it back.
But in the case of gambling if you go broke you are not a victim of some unforeseen misfortune. You are a loser and deserve whatever consequences come of it. You could have managed your money better, or you could have bet more intelligently. I take no shared responsibility. If you want me to share in your fortunes let's discuss it in advance. Let's plan the betting events together and discuss what proportion we are each in it. But to keep the money when you win and expect me to bail you out when you lose, well, that's not the kind of behavior I expect from a friend.
He then pointed out that I'm not really a good friend if I can't be relied on to help in a time of need. Then I corrected him by showing a number of examples when I would be more than happy to help out like unexpected illness, girl problems etc. In those cases I would have no problem giving some $$$ but I would certainly not expect him to give it back.
But in the case of gambling if you go broke you are not a victim of some unforeseen misfortune. You are a loser and deserve whatever consequences come of it. You could have managed your money better, or you could have bet more intelligently. I take no shared responsibility. If you want me to share in your fortunes let's discuss it in advance. Let's plan the betting events together and discuss what proportion we are each in it. But to keep the money when you win and expect me to bail you out when you lose, well, that's not the kind of behavior I expect from a friend.
I just learned a valuable lesson about 6 weeks ago. I would never lend money to anyone again unless it someone who has always been there and had my back even if I never asked them to. There are less than a handful of people that fit this description for me. But if you are going to lend money, don't expect to get it back. If you do it is a bonus.
Amounts less than $50: If and/or when they can pay it back.
Amounts $50-$500: Collateral that you could and would use if stiffed and not be pissed about it.
More than $500: Extremely high level of trust is needed. No collateral is needed but an offering as a show of good faith is desirable. Only 3 people currently fit this profile in my life.
These are my general rules for lending money. Not that I don't make exceptions but I try to follow it to the letter. Trust and honor are the most important factors in my decision. Others in this thread have made good points as well.
Amounts $50-$500: Collateral that you could and would use if stiffed and not be pissed about it.
More than $500: Extremely high level of trust is needed. No collateral is needed but an offering as a show of good faith is desirable. Only 3 people currently fit this profile in my life.
These are my general rules for lending money. Not that I don't make exceptions but I try to follow it to the letter. Trust and honor are the most important factors in my decision. Others in this thread have made good points as well.
There are some to whom I freely lend money, but I would NEVER LOAN MONEY TO SOMEONE KNOWING THEY ARE GOING TO USE IT TO GAMBLE WITH. It's simply a losing proposition.
Now, if it is for a different reason, a most important factor has got to be the person's "CHARACTER & TRACK HISTORY."
<UL TYPE=SQUARE><LI>Has he paid you back on previous ocassions?
<LI>Is he the one looking for you when payment(s) are due, or do you find yourself chasing him around everytime a payment is due?
[/list]
Don't forget: It is a blessing to be on the side of those with a possibility to lend, and not on the side of those needing a loan.
Now, if it is for a different reason, a most important factor has got to be the person's "CHARACTER & TRACK HISTORY."
<UL TYPE=SQUARE><LI>Has he paid you back on previous ocassions?
<LI>Is he the one looking for you when payment(s) are due, or do you find yourself chasing him around everytime a payment is due?
[/list]
Don't forget: It is a blessing to be on the side of those with a possibility to lend, and not on the side of those needing a loan.
I simply say,
Im not a bank, I dont make my income by collecting interest, and I dont feel like chasing for my money.
Ive loaned tens of thousands in my life that has not been paid back. Every single time, the money was coming back on time, guaranteed, no way will I get stiffed.
Every single time, the money came late, much later than the guarantee. Or it didnt come back at all.
Everyone that asks me for money has someone else they can ask, or has access to a bank. If nobody else will lend money, then why should you or I.
Its simple, just say no, Not until Ive regained my trust in human beings that get themselves into the type of shit that they need to borrow money. When all my old debts are paid, Ill reconsider lending money again in the future.
Just my thoughts. If you are not willing to give it away, then dont lend it.
-lab
Im not a bank, I dont make my income by collecting interest, and I dont feel like chasing for my money.
Ive loaned tens of thousands in my life that has not been paid back. Every single time, the money was coming back on time, guaranteed, no way will I get stiffed.
Every single time, the money came late, much later than the guarantee. Or it didnt come back at all.
Everyone that asks me for money has someone else they can ask, or has access to a bank. If nobody else will lend money, then why should you or I.
Its simple, just say no, Not until Ive regained my trust in human beings that get themselves into the type of shit that they need to borrow money. When all my old debts are paid, Ill reconsider lending money again in the future.
Just my thoughts. If you are not willing to give it away, then dont lend it.
-lab
