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Thread: I JUST GOT ROBBED

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  1. #26  
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    I have no idea if the weekly thread contest is going on, but if it is, you guys have got to give it to Jim for this one! I dont think a winner has to necessarily refer to sports, a good laugh is important now and then!
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  2. #27  
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    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PIPE:
    LIKE GETTING MOWER JACKED BY SOME CRAZED NIGERIAN <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    THE NIGERIAN NIGHTMARE IS BACK!!!!!!!!!
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  3. #28  
    RX Member miked429's Avatar
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    maybe don king needed a haircut or oprah wanted a bikini wax.
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  4. #29  
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    Jimbo,

    I don't mean to be a jerk or anything, but you really don't need a lawnmower...

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  5. #30  
    I GRIN WHEN I WIN BEANTOWNJIM's Avatar
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    BOYS MY WIFE JUST WENT CRAZY ON ME SHE WANTS TO KNOW HOW A 43 YEAR OLD MAN COULD LEAVE THE LAWN HALF DONE THEN GO ON HIS COMPUTER AND TALK TO A BUNCH OF FOOLS AS OUR LAWNMOWER IS BEING STOLEN.I AM DUE 1300 DOLLARS FOR ALLOWANCES AND BUSINESS EXPENSES THE 1ST OF THE MONTH.

    I KNOW THIS SOUNDS CRAZY BUT IS THERE A SPORTSBOOK WHO WILL ACCEPT MY 1300 DOLLARS BUT HERES THE CATCH I WANT THE FULL 1300 FOR GAMBLING PURPOSES BUT I WANT TO KNOW IF A SPORTSBOOK WOULD TAKE MY BONUS MONEY AND HAVE HOME DEPOT DELIVER A BRAND NEW BRIGGS AND STRATTON LAWNMOWER SO I CAN PUT IT ON MY BOOKS AS A BUSINESS EXPENSE SO HONEY PIE WILL STOP YELLING AT ME.I KNOW DEAR I AM SORRY HOW WAS I TO KNOW THAT DUMB F-CK NEXT DOOR WOULD LET A COLORED GUY STEAL OUR LAWNMOWER DONT WORRY DEAR I WILL BUY A NEW ONE OUT OF MY ALLOWANCE NOW LEAVE ME ALONE I AM TALKING TO A SHRINK.

    I SEND OURT 1500 DOLLARS COLD CASH I GET 20% BONUS I FULLFILL ALL THE REQUIREMENTS.ALL I ASK IS THAT A LAWNMOWER IS BOUT WITH THE 250 DOLLAR BONUS MONEY.I JUST WENT TO HOME DEPOT I CAN GET A BRAND NEW BRIGGS AND STRATTON FOR 149.99 WITH TAX 152.99 AND THE DELIVERY FEE IS 20.00 DOLLARS SO ALL I AM ASKING FOR IS A NEW LAWNMOWER AND WE HAVE A DEAL.THIS COULD BE THE START OF SOMETHING NEW OFFSHORE THE PLAYERS ASK FOR A GIFT INSTEAD OF THE BONUS MONEY.THINK ABOUT IT SPORTSBOOKS INSTEAD OF SENDING THE GUYS 300 DOLLARS IN BONUS MONEY YOU COULD BUY THEM A NEW BIG BERTHA DRIVER AND EVERYBODY ID HAPPY I REALLY LIKE THIS CONCEPT.THE GAMBLER PLAYS OF HIS INITIAL DEPOSIT AND THE BONUS MONEY GOES FOR A GIFT.O.K. I WILL TAKE BROWNIE FOR A WALK DEAR JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE I WANT TO SAY GOODBYE TO THE SHRINK WOW THE LOOK SHE JUST GAVE ME.SO THINK ABOUT IT FELLAS I HAVE TO RUN OUT AGAIN MAN THIS DOG IS GETTING TO BE A PAIN IN THE ARSE
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  6. #31  
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    you sure the dog ain't walking you ?
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  7. #32  
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    Here is the real 'lawn' mower - no match play needed
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  8. #33  
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    Great post Jimmy.
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  9. #34  
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    robbed

    what ??did someone stick their thumb up your ass and not pay??

    panther
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  10. #35  
    RX Member Gringo in CR's Avatar
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    This would be even more funny if it was a riding lawn mower. I have this scene playing through my head of the guy in the video, "pretty fly for a white guy" walking up to an expensive john deere, turning the key and driving it down the road.

    Sucks to have stuff stolen but at least it wasn't a $2K riding mower. Cough up the buck to buy a new one.

    This time put an alarm on it
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  11. #36  
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    maybe we should have a buy jimmy a lawnmower fund. I'll start by offering 20$ ******. 10 more people and jimmy has a new mower. Just for the pedro tips alone he's a good man.
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  12. #37  
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    Beantown Jim <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> .I KNOW DEAR I AM SORRY HOW WAS I TO KNOW THAT DUMB F-CK NEXT DOOR WOULD LET A COLORED GUY STEAL OUR LAWNMOWER DONT WORRY DEAR I WILL BUY A NEW ONE OUT OF MY ALLOWANCE <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Jim, this is hilarious. I have sometimes questioned your threads and posts on here, but this one alone has won me over~! This is no doubt the funni est thread I have ever read here!
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  13. #38  
    RX Member Gringo in CR's Avatar
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    Damn Yuri just sitting there watching him!

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  14. #39  
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    BTJ,you rule this sorry planet
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  15. #40  
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    Too bad he didn't steal your computer instead of the stupid lawnmower...
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  16. #41  
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    Hilarious.

    Gringo that is a great picture too.
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  17. #42  
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    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Hache man:
    I have no idea if the weekly thread contest is going on, but if it is, you guys have got to give it to Jim for this one! I dont think a winner has to necessarily refer to sports, a good laugh is important now and then! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>


    Hache - good idea but the deadline for post of the week was 206PM. Looks like Jim was 15 minutes past the cut off time again.

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  18. #43  
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    BTJ, thanks for the laughs.
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  19. #44  
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    Gringo, great pic! Beanbrain, next time Brownie takes YOU for a walk, (great line from Balls) why not TIE his ARSE to a tree out front maybe your new friend needs a dog too!!
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  20. #45  
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    Hey Beaner :

    Yuri just called said he saw a Nigerian running off with your wife .
    Said he would be back for Brownie later




    [This message was edited by skirmish on August 26, 2003 at 11:35 AM.]

    [This message was edited by skirmish on August 26, 2003 at 11:37 AM.]
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  21. #46  
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    WELL BOYS MY WIFE AND I JUST RETURNED FROM THE HOME DEPOT WE ARE NOW PROUD OWNERS OF THE (HONDA TORO RECYCLER LAWNWOWER 6.5 ENGINE)I DONT LIKE TO BRAG BUT AS OF 9.40 TONIGHT BEANTOWNJIM NOW OWNS THE ROLLS ROYCE OF LAWNMOWERS I CANT BELIEVE HOW NICE THIS IS.MY WIFE TOLD ME TO PUT IT IN THE GARAGE I SAID ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH THIS F-CKING RUSSIAN NEXT DOOR THIS MOWER IS GOING IN THE LIVING ROOM UNTIL I GET A LOCK FOR THIS BEAUTY.THE SALESMAN ASKED MY WIFE AND I WHEN YOU GO TO WATCH THE RED SOX WHATS THE FIRST THING THAT ENTERS YOUR MIND.MY WIFE SAID THE WALL STICKS OUT SHE CANT BELIEVE HOW HIGH IT IS,THEN THE SALESMAN SAYS TO ME HOW ABOUT YOU JIM I SAID WELL I FIRST LOOK AT THE BROADS SELLING THE BEER JUST KIDDING MY WIFE PINCHES ME TO STOP THEN I SAID THE FIRST THING I LOOK AT IS THE GIANT SCOREBOARD IN CENTER FIELD.THE SALESMAN SAY WRONG ANSWER FOLKS DO YOU SEE HOW WELL CUT THE INFIELD IS AROUND THE MOUND I SAID NO NOT REALLY THEN THE SALESMAN SAYS NEXT TIME YOU GO LOOK AND SEE AND THEN YOU WILL REALIZE JUST HOW GOOD THIS LAWNMOWER YOU ARE GOING TO BUY IS.I LOOKED AT MY WIFE AND SAID WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS NUT HE REALLY TAKES HIS MOWERS SERIOUSLY.HE SAID JOE MOONEY THE HEAD GROUNDSKEEPER AT FENWAY PARK USES THE EXACT SAME LAWNMOWER YOU GUYS ARE GOING TO BUY DID YOU HEAR WHAT I JUST SAID JIM JOE MOONEY FROM FENWAY PARK USES THE (HONDA 6.5 TORO LAWNMOWER TO CUT FENWAY PARKS INFIELD.WOW BOYS I NOW OWN THE SAME LAWNMOWER AS JOE MOONEY THIS IS AN AMAZING HONOR.BOYS AS I WAS GOING TO BUY THIS FLOOR MODEL I SAVED 59 DOLLARS PLUS IT WAS ALREADY ASSEMBLED. THE NIGERIAN CASHIER SAYS WOW THATS A NICE MOWER I DONT KNOW WHAT GOT INTO ME BUT I SAID YEH AND KEEP YOUR HANDS OFF IT.THE POOR KID LOOKED AT ME LIKE I WAS A GOD DAM WHITE SUPREMIST MY WIFE ALSO SAID SHE WILL NEVER GO TO HOME DEPOT WITH ME AGAIN I AM AN EMBARRASSMENT WHO THINKS HES FUNNY.THIS MOWER COST ME A PRETTY PENNY BOYS RETAIL 369 BUCKS AND IT COMES WITH A JOE MOONEY AUTOGRAPH I PAID 275.99 BECAUSE IT WAS RIGHT OFF THE FLOOR AND IT HAD A SMALL DENT.I WONT BE ABLE TO SLEEP TONIGHT I AM STAYING UP PROTECTING THE LAWNMOWER EVEN THOUGH ITS IN MY LIVING ROOM I AM NOT TAKING ANY CHANCES WITH THE RUSSIAN SPY NEXT DOOR.I CANT WAIT TO SEE YURIS FACE WHEN I BREAK OUT THE ROLLS TOMORROW MORNING I AM CUTTING THE GRASS AT 6.30 AM JUST SO I CAN WAKE UP THAT F-CKING RUSSIAN HE WILL SAY WHAT THE F-CK IS ALL THAT NOISE THEN I WANT HIM TO LOOK OUT HIS WINDOW AND SEE MY NEW LAWNMOWER.I CAN SEE HIS BIG STUPID FACE HALF ASLEEP LOOKING OUT AND ME WAVING SEE THIS LAWNMOWER YURI ITS MINE AND DONT EVER LET ANOTHER NIGERIAN ON MY PROPERTY O.K. NOW GO BANG YOUR OLD LADY BEFORE I DO

    IF ANYBODY IS AT THE HOME DEPOT SOMETIME HAVE A LOOK AT JOE MOONEYS MOWER ITS THE HONDA TORO 6.5 RECYCLER MAN I CANT WAIT TO STARTN THIS BABY UP.
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  22. #47  
    I GRIN WHEN I WIN BEANTOWNJIM's Avatar
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    IF ANYBODY WANTS TO SEE MY NEW ROLLS ROYCE GO TO WWW.TORO.COM MY NEW MOWER IS THE ONE THAT SAYS HOMEOWNER NOW TELL ME IF THAT ISNT A BEAUTY.I MIGHT EVEN GO INTO THE LANDSCAPING BUSINESS IF I CAN FIND A BUNCH OF BRAZILIANS WHO ARE LOOKING TO WORK FOR LOW DOUGH.THESE BRAZILIANS ARE GREAT LANDSCAPERS THEY DO ALL THE WORK AT LOCAL GOLF COURSES JUST DONT YELL IMMAGRATION OR THE FAIRWAYS WILL NEVER GET CUT.
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  23. #48  
    RX Senior Pancho Sanza's Avatar
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    Instead of buying a new mower, why didn't you just let your wife out to graze the lawn?
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  24. #49  
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    Play "Roots" backward? I am rolling on the floor on this one!
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  25. #50  
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    A classic

    I just picked myself up off the floor.
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