Girlfriends and Gambling Don't MIX!

First, I live in North Alabama..yes I know....don't laugh...but I am probably the only person within 100 miles of my house that could name 2 NBA teams and/or 1 NBA (current player-besides Jordan) player.

Let me begin. Let's say it is Tuesday night. The Knicks/Kings are playing...I have $550 on the over. Game is on at 6:30, girlfriend gets off work at 6..stops by, wants to go out to eat..I explain that I have action on a game..so I say to her sit down, shut up and pop a lean cuisine into the microwave (you need to lose the weight). Well, I didn't really say that , but I wanted to . I explain that it is not a good time to leave the house. I kind of want to see what I am getting instead of going out to dinner and listen to her whine about her mother and her hair and her nails and all that "stuff." In reality when that happens, all I can see are her lips moving and thinking to myself...Hmm..."should be the end of the first quarter and i need about 50.5 points per quarter..let's see if this restraunt has a t.v in the bar so I can catch a scroll. I have explaied to her and many other ladies that I make more money on a given night on gambling that they make at their jobs at Big Lots in 2 weeks. They always reply "you're always watching 'dem ol' ball games! " (Southern term) I should reply: "And you're always on your feet listening to Mrs. Johnson and her husband complain because they were shorted 3 cents in change on a transaction they made 6 months ago."
So who is the fool here?

I read a post here where people were complaining to never talk Gambling with family. I couldn't agree more. This is what you get with talking gambling with family. 1. are ya winnin'? 2. How much you gonna win? 3. How much you down? 4. I bet you down big. 5. How much did you bet? (my reply: $550.00) their reply. "So how much you gonna win off that? (my reply: $500)..their reply "So you're gonna lose $50 just by betting cause you bet $550 and get back $500, that ain't right I'm telling ya!" (my reply, "NO Jethro!..It is a total return of $1050.) Their return reply:"Well, I just don't understand all that. You wanna bet $5 on the Alabama-Auburn game..I'll take 'Bama!" My reply: No Jethro..Rivalry games are not a good bet for me. Their reply: You're scared aren't ya!..My reply: "Here Jethro, take this $50 and go "freak " yourself.)
All of this from the family and girlfriend side must be read using a Hillbilly sounding accent..) I am sure everyone has been in these situations, maybe not as "Deliverance" themed as I have, but everyone can relate. And don't you just hate it when you let someone in on a wager you made and they go against you . I had Hawaii to cover on Christmas night and the while time my family was asking "Why do you care about a bunch of Japanese people playing football, they need to go back to their own country." ..Upon which point at Halftime..I excused myself to go home and on the way out the driveway I slashed 3 tires on 3 different cars with the Swiss Army knife I received from an online sportsbook. BOOOOOOOO YA!!!!!!
(p.s. I dumped the girlfriend)

try wife and 2 kids and gambling.

LOL

Welcome aboard

NEVER get MARRIED!!!! :nono5:
Have you never watched.."Married with Children?"
That cured me from getting married in 1989 when I was 16.

I can Imagine how Difficult and annoying it must be to try to watch a game and concentrate while trying to compete with "Spongebob Wethispants" and the "Limfetime Original Movie"

Good for you kid.
You figured it out way before I ever did. :hanging:

Sounds to me like you treated her like crap.

You put a hobby in front of a girl and you expect to get good results?

Don't take this the wrong way... Maybe you'll be happy living the single life. Not EVERYONE is meant to get married or even have a serious girlfriend.

Not everyone can handle that. My wife doesn't have a problem... But I also treat her well.

Amazing what you can get in return when you treat someone w/ decency.

yes i agree about the part that how they think that when you bet 550 u only get back 500 the general public are a bunch of morons.

Also when you are out and try to get a score over the phone your family looks at you like you have commited a crime.

NICEGUY47911 said:

Upon which point at Halftime..I excused myself to go home and on the way out the driveway I slashed 3 tires on 3 different cars with the Swiss Army knife I received from an online sportsbook. BOOOOOOOO YA!!!!!!
(p.s. I dumped the girlfriend)

Click to expand...

great story, lmao :toast: .....HF

TANG said:

yes i agree about the part that how they think that when you bet 550 u only get back 500 the general public are a bunch of morons.

Also when you are out and try to get a score over the phone your family looks at you like you have commited a crime.

Click to expand...

Probably because most people who have pagers or use score phones are degenerates.

Bet on the game and relax. You guys who watch these games you wager on are just going to kill yourself young.

Seriously....I agree with WorldRunner because it is good advice.
Second time around for me and its a world of difference.

Ooooooo I almost forgot!!

People around here in Alabama go over to Tunica , MS quite often to play the slots. Because slots are OK to them.
Here is the story each time you talk to one of these people.

So, how did you win in Tunica?
reply: won $400.00!
my reply: Wow good job.
Their reply: I put it all back in tho.
my reply: But you said you won $400.
Their reply: I did..I started out with $100..hit a few times got up to $500 and ended up puttin it all back in tho.
my reply: you moron, you lost $100. cause ya didn't come back with what you initially won plus your $100.
Their reply: Naw..I won $400!! That's how much came out.
My reply: Slaps my forehad..says" OK OK You won" " I don't see how those casino's stay in business with sharp shooters like you . "
No need to argue, happens every time

You should meet my friend LANDER, he loves the south especially the people..Im sure he will be able to help you......

i do not check by the minute but if I have a large play for me which is over 1500 I will pay more attention to it. i do not have a pager.

great story dude,

And it all sounds pretty familiar! You forgot two parts though,.....
Part One: when you tell them who you wagered on, and your bet loses, invariably they say something like "well why did you pick that team, why didn't you just go with the team that won?" (girlfriends are incredibly good at hindsight).

Part Two: "Oh you won how much? Well great, now you can buy me that Blah-blah-blah thing that I wanted" (girlfriends also very good at spending your winnings)

I think you got it right though,.....most of your gambling tales are better left untold. You're a moron if you lose and a money tree if you win.

last night I told gf I was taking USC, mostly because the entire universe was on OU, .....before the game she says,...If you're not POSITIVE who's going to win, why bet it? (??????WTF? kind of reasoning is that??)
After the game......." why didn't you bet A LOT more on the game"

I guess because I'm an idiot!! women....you got a love em!

BTF

I'm always a more successful gambler when I'm not dating someone b/c of the time needed to come out ahead. Just makes sense.

I agree with treehouse

I lost about a grand on New years day Bowls, told gf the next day and she says
"well why did you pick those losing teams in the first place"? I said, "maybe it had something to do with the fact that I spent all night and day with you, instead of at my computer,....gathering information!"

I'm just like you Treehouse, I NEED my time to do research, homework, whatever you want to call it. She doesn't get that at all,....seems to think I can just pick them out of my :carto1710

LOL, oh well..............

BTF

Women dont like guys that gamble period

We are losers

when I was with my EX, I used to tell her we'd go get "this" or go "there" (something she wanted at the time) if Team A won or lost by less than "x"

It worked wonders, she was very into it.

depends JJ. I think its just sports.

I know plenty of cute girls actually I should say women that like foxwoods and the state lottery.

its cool as long as you dont bring it up "hey i got this much on this game! i need them, then my balance will be this!, I took a hit yesterday wisky screwed me!" like a total dork then you will be ok. also dont let them see that it effects your life. thats when youre loser status in their eyes.

only thing i ever bring up is "i need to pick up a western union." . .oh ya kid.

yeah, its best not to talk about gambling with family. if they ask me now and I've been winning I just say " I been doin good lately" and leave it at that. If I've been losing, I tell them I've been losing. Everyone expects you to lose anyway so if you tell them about how much you've been winning lately and how great your doing lately they think your lying or making it up and probably really lost a lot. if you tell them you've been losing, they believe you.

Here's why YOU NEVER TELL YOUR WIFE/GIRLFRIEND, etc. about gambling winnings: I was in Las Vegas with my dad and brother in law. Brother in law got hammered at the blackjack table but somehow won like 10 grand. he told my sister( his wife) all about it when she called. She yelled at him for betting too much and told him hes a degenerate gambler, this after a nice win, God help him should he have lost. She also informed him that under no circumstances was he to gamble anymore over the next two days he was going to be in Vegas and that ALL of the 10 grand he won was to be turned over to her immidiately when he got home.

So of course he kept gambling, what else you gonna do in Vegas, get up 10 grand and sit by the pool for two days, thats no fun. So he loses a lot back but when he gets home he had to hand over what was left and get yelled at cause it wasnt 10 grand. My sister mentally spent all that 10 grand once she found out about it. So my brother in law went to Vegas, had a great time ( EZ to do) and won 3-4 dimes at blackjack ( not so easy to do) and got yelled at for winning and not keeping all the winnings. Plus he had to turn over all the winnings which my sister spent.