an Illini Fan in Nigeria! Risky Free GOY!

FalseDmitri · Oct 24, 2006

looks like they root for my alma mater even in the slums of Lagos, Nigeria!
In order to verify his ID before "Tom Ace, Pet Detective" will send him Western Union to conclude a "risky free" diamond transaction, he had to send me a personalized photo commerating our raping of MSU.
I've already slapped him for not writing MSU's losing score of 20!

FalseDmitri · Oct 24, 2006

just so you know, Tom Ace is a REAL pet detective, not like that imposter Jim Carey. Here's the 200% risky free proof:

WVU · Oct 24, 2006

come again

theticket_22 · Oct 24, 2006

:monsters- :WTF:

FalseDmitri · Oct 24, 2006

he's one of those Nigerian e-mail scammers. I wanted something to celebrate U of IL's sole big ten victory, and he seemed like a perfect candidate.

Its what they call scam baiting (its actually got a huge cult following on the internet), where you f*ck with email scammers to prevent them from actually stealing money from people.

I imagine you've gotten those stupid spam scam emails before

theticket_22 · Oct 24, 2006

if u acually did what i think your saying u did...that would be fucking hilarious...

WVU · Oct 24, 2006

post the emails. This should be good

Illini · Oct 24, 2006

theticket_22 said:
if u acually did what i think your saying u did...that would be fucking hilarious...

He did. And I still haven't stopped laughing.

FalseDmitri · Oct 24, 2006

here's his first email, notice his warning of the "spate of Internet scamms"

DEAR BROTHER
I WAS ENCOURAGED TO CONTACT YOU AFTER A LONG TIME
OF
ROUNDPOINT OF MISSERY. IWISH YOU WILL TAKE THIS WITH
UTMOST TRUST
CONSIDERING THE SPATE OF INTERNET SCAMMS
THIS DAYS,AFTER MY SEARCH
THROUGH THE INTERNET WHERE I
GOT YOUR CONTACTS,I WAS CONVINCED THAT YOU
WILL BE OF
GREAT HELP TO REVIVE ME AGAIN.I AM A NATIONALITY OF
SIERRALONE IN WEST AFRICA AND MY NAME ARE MR TIJAN
GEORGE. A WELLKNOW
MERCHANT OF GOLD ,DIAMOND AND CONGLOMERATES.
MY ORDEAL STARTED
WHEN I CAME BACK FROM SAUDI
ARABIA WHERE I HAD A TRANSACTION WITH
ALHAJI HANZA
USSANNI .LITTLE DID I KNOW THAT WE HAD A TUMOIL IN MY
COUNTRY ICAME IN AND RAN INTO A MILLITANT GROUP WHICH
NEARLY TOOK MY
LIFE.ILOOSED EVERYTHING I HAD BOTH
MONEY ,MY NATIONALITY IDENTITY AND
MY INTERNATIONAL
PASSPORT.I TRIED TO GET TO MY HOUSE TO IT WAS NOT
POSSIBLE FOR ME.I FLEE TO TAKE
REFUGE IN A NEARBY COUNTRY WHERE I AM
CURRENTLY A
REFUGEE.MY ONLY HOPE FOR LIFE SURVIVAL RIGHT NOW IS
THE IS
THE DIAMOND THAT I HAD IN STOCK, I HAVE TRIED
TO SALE IT HERE BUT THE
PRICE THE ARE GIVING ME HERE
IS FAR BELOW AVERAGE.A DIAMOND THAT WORTH
OVER TWO
MILLION DOLLARS($2USD),IS WHAT THEY ARE OFFERING ME
BELOW A
MILLION DOLLAR.
SO PLEASE I WOULD LIKE TO TELL YOU TO NEGOTIATE
FOR A BUYER IN YOUR COUNTRY SINCE I CAN NOT MAKE ANY
MOVE FOR NOW.SO
THAT WE WILL SALE IT .I WILL GIVE YOU
20% OF THE PROCEED.THANKS AND
GODBLESS AS I WAIT FOR
YOUR ANTICIPATED COMPLIANCE.
BEST REGARDS
GEORGE

FalseDmitri · Oct 24, 2006

after some BS about diamonds and refugees, here's what I wrote him:

Hi George!
I would advise to go through TOGO in order to save money on duties. I understand that you are a refugee and you may need help covering the costs of the duty. In order to build trust, here are some of my contact info:

Thomas Ace
222 S. State Street
Champagin, IL 61820
USA
Age: 34
Sex: male
Marital Status: Single
I don't currently have a phone since I have a hearing disability that makes it difficult to communicate over the phone.
Attached is a copy of my state issued university ID.

Again, you are a refugee and may difficulty obtaining proper papers. I have an easy way for you to prove your idenity and the level of trust needed for this transaction.
I have used this method before when sending money out of the US to gambling websites (gambling is illegal in this country), and have found it to be very effective.
I would like you to send me a picture of yourself holding a sign with a password I give you on it. This way I know you are who you say you are and the you can be trusted.

If you can send me a CLEAR picture of yourself holding a sign that says:

MSU 20 Illini 23

After you do this small favor, we can then continue to work on getting the diamonds out of your country! I hope to hear from you!

Sincerely,
Tom Ace

FalseDmitri · Oct 24, 2006

I'm not happy with Georgey-Boy. I want a trophy to remember my Illini's victory!

George,
I appreciate the effort and I am glad to see you attempt to show trust in this transaction. As I said, we should go through customs of a different country.
By the way, I have contacted a jeweler i know who is interested in selling the diamonds for us.

However, there was a slight problem with the password phrase I sent you. It should read

MSU 20
ILLINI 23

I know this seems like a small problem, but i want to make sure everything is legitimate. Then I will be able to help you pay with the finances in this transaction that may occur in order to fulfill this great transaction.

Sincerely,
Tom Ace, Pet Detective

FalseDmitri · Oct 24, 2006

he replied!

DEAR TOM ACE ,
THANKS FOR YOUR MAIL,BUT WHAT YOU WROTE NOW IS
NOT LIKE THIS BEFORE,THAT WAS WHY YOU SEE IT THAT WAY.
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO ABOUT THIS? SHOULD I GO
AND DO ANOTHER ONE.JUST LET ME KNOW YOU HAVE SEEN THAT
TIME IS NO LONGER ON OUR SIDE.
TELL ME I WANT US TO START UP.

FalseDmitri · Oct 24, 2006

alright, so what's next? Anybody have ideas for some silly pictures? Perhaps a birthday card for someone you know? The possibilities are endless, as this lad is eager to please.

Should I send a fake WU payment slip or try to see if I can convince him to get a TATOO for some extra WU funds?

primetime21+ · Oct 24, 2006

how can you put him through that after all he has been through??

by the way, classic!

Paterno · Oct 24, 2006

Great thread!

TTinCO · Oct 24, 2006

False Dmitri said:
he's one of those Nigerian e-mail scammers. I wanted something to celebrate U of IL's sole big ten victory, and he seemed like a perfect candidate.

Its what they call scam baiting (its actually got a huge cult following on the internet), where you f*ck with email scammers to prevent them from actually stealing money from people.

I imagine you've gotten those stupid spam scam emails before

This is to much-PLEASE tell me that this is for real.

(He screwed up his sign & had to put up the white wall behind himself-I love it.)

Kornholio · Oct 24, 2006

That is hilarious..to bad he forgot the 20. Have him redo it.

And don't convince him to get a tattoo, that is too far.

Kornholio · Oct 24, 2006

TTinCO said:
This is to much-PLEASE tell me that this is for real.

(He screwed up his sign & had to put up the white wall behind himself-I love it.)

It is for real, I know for a fact that False did this...hilarious

Paterno · Oct 24, 2006

Wasn't there a thread or website where a guy made this guy travel all these countries looking for him. I think he pretended to be with a church and it went on forever.

FalseDmitri · Oct 24, 2006

no, its for real. I say we take a vote:

I want him to get a tatoo....shoulder or bicep? I'm thinking of trying to get him to get theRX.com in ink...think about, permanent advertising! I expect a royalty check, Willheim.