You are about to marvel at a monumental feat of investigative journalism -- a gopher tale.
Gainer The Gopher has apparently been (gasp!) barred from McMahon Stadium for Sunday's CFL playoff game between his beloved Saskatchewan Roughriders and the Calgary Stampeders.
The news was conveyed Monday by Terry Ennis, who first donned the mascot's costume at a Roughriders home game 20 years ago.
One might expect Gainer to be devastated by his exclusion, but he is not inclined to crawl into a hole.
"I feel honoured,'' Ennis said. "I think it's a compliment when they don't want you to come because you might get people going. That means that maybe it means something to somebody, so I'm thrilled and humbled by that.''
Ennis was equally thrilled when he was contacted by a member of the Roughriders organization and asked whether Gainer wanted to go to Calgary.
"I got an e-mail saying, 'The staff is on the bus. Are you ready to roll?' '' he recalled. "I said, 'Let's go!'
"Two days later, I got an e-mail from the same person, saying, 'Sorry, Terry. Change of plans. The Calgary Stampeders are unwilling to let you into the stadium.' ''
It has come to this. The very same franchise, which once opened its doors to the oft-convicted Lawrence Phillips, is now prohibiting a harmless mascot from entering the stadium.
What do these people have against oversized rodents?
The Stampeders' rationale is unclear. A request for an interview with somebody in the Calgary organization did not elicit a response on Monday. Somehow, our favourite planet kept revolving.
"I inquired a little further and, in so many words, they said that Gainer would get the crowd into an unruly-type fashion,'' Ennis said. "I guess they mean the Rider fans.
"I think what's on their minds, really, is that the place is going to be a 50-50 split with the fans. They know Gainer's reputation is that he gets the people going, obviously, and maybe that would happen in their park and maybe that would drown out their guy, Ralph The Dog, and give us a bit of an advantage.
"Nobody ever said to me what their true reasons are but, reading into it, that's got to be what it is because I'm not that important.''
Nor will he be imported, it appears.
The climate was distinctly different 30 years ago, when the Stampeders were generous enough to lend Ralph The Dog to the Roughriders during the playoffs. In fact, Ralph was the only mascot at Taylor Field when Saskatchewan registered its most-recent home playoff victory -- a 23-13 conquest of the Edmonton Eskimos in the 1976 Western final.
Gainer was born the following season, when the Roughriders began an 11-year playoff drought. (Hmmmm. Maybe it was his fault!)
The Riders are now preparing for their fifth consecutive trip to the playoffs. In recent years, Gainer has been welcomed by rival teams in the West.
"People can say what they want about the Edmonton Eskimos, but (before the 2004 West semifinal) they said, 'Bring him. Pleasure to have him,' '' Ennis said. "It was the same with the B.C. Lions that year. In those days, Trent Fraser was the Riders' marketing guy and he made a call and they said, 'Absolutely. Love to have him here.' ''
The Stampeders appear to be less receptive. Ennis has toyed with the notion of boarding the bus, regardless, but is likely to remain in Regina. Neither the Roughriders organization nor Ennis is making a big deal out of this.
"I'm extremely happy to go, but it's not the end of the world if I don't,'' said Ennis, who is a sales representative with Supreme Basics. "My football team will be fine. I think we'll come out with a win. I'm confident of that.
"I plan to sit with Mrs. Gainer, if she'll hold my hand, and we'll watch it on our big-screen TV. It's not a bad consolation prize.''
Isn't there a way around this? As a gopher, can't Gainer burrow a hole underneath McMahon Stadium and emerge with unprecedented flourish?
"Maybe,'' Ennis said with a chuckle. "It might be like Bugs Bunny when he pops up and says, 'Oh, I should have taken that left at Albuquerque ...
Gainer The Gopher has apparently been (gasp!) barred from McMahon Stadium for Sunday's CFL playoff game between his beloved Saskatchewan Roughriders and the Calgary Stampeders.
The news was conveyed Monday by Terry Ennis, who first donned the mascot's costume at a Roughriders home game 20 years ago.
One might expect Gainer to be devastated by his exclusion, but he is not inclined to crawl into a hole.
"I feel honoured,'' Ennis said. "I think it's a compliment when they don't want you to come because you might get people going. That means that maybe it means something to somebody, so I'm thrilled and humbled by that.''
Ennis was equally thrilled when he was contacted by a member of the Roughriders organization and asked whether Gainer wanted to go to Calgary.
"I got an e-mail saying, 'The staff is on the bus. Are you ready to roll?' '' he recalled. "I said, 'Let's go!'
"Two days later, I got an e-mail from the same person, saying, 'Sorry, Terry. Change of plans. The Calgary Stampeders are unwilling to let you into the stadium.' ''
It has come to this. The very same franchise, which once opened its doors to the oft-convicted Lawrence Phillips, is now prohibiting a harmless mascot from entering the stadium.
What do these people have against oversized rodents?
The Stampeders' rationale is unclear. A request for an interview with somebody in the Calgary organization did not elicit a response on Monday. Somehow, our favourite planet kept revolving.
"I inquired a little further and, in so many words, they said that Gainer would get the crowd into an unruly-type fashion,'' Ennis said. "I guess they mean the Rider fans.
"I think what's on their minds, really, is that the place is going to be a 50-50 split with the fans. They know Gainer's reputation is that he gets the people going, obviously, and maybe that would happen in their park and maybe that would drown out their guy, Ralph The Dog, and give us a bit of an advantage.
"Nobody ever said to me what their true reasons are but, reading into it, that's got to be what it is because I'm not that important.''
Nor will he be imported, it appears.
The climate was distinctly different 30 years ago, when the Stampeders were generous enough to lend Ralph The Dog to the Roughriders during the playoffs. In fact, Ralph was the only mascot at Taylor Field when Saskatchewan registered its most-recent home playoff victory -- a 23-13 conquest of the Edmonton Eskimos in the 1976 Western final.
Gainer was born the following season, when the Roughriders began an 11-year playoff drought. (Hmmmm. Maybe it was his fault!)
The Riders are now preparing for their fifth consecutive trip to the playoffs. In recent years, Gainer has been welcomed by rival teams in the West.
"People can say what they want about the Edmonton Eskimos, but (before the 2004 West semifinal) they said, 'Bring him. Pleasure to have him,' '' Ennis said. "It was the same with the B.C. Lions that year. In those days, Trent Fraser was the Riders' marketing guy and he made a call and they said, 'Absolutely. Love to have him here.' ''
The Stampeders appear to be less receptive. Ennis has toyed with the notion of boarding the bus, regardless, but is likely to remain in Regina. Neither the Roughriders organization nor Ennis is making a big deal out of this.
"I'm extremely happy to go, but it's not the end of the world if I don't,'' said Ennis, who is a sales representative with Supreme Basics. "My football team will be fine. I think we'll come out with a win. I'm confident of that.
"I plan to sit with Mrs. Gainer, if she'll hold my hand, and we'll watch it on our big-screen TV. It's not a bad consolation prize.''
Isn't there a way around this? As a gopher, can't Gainer burrow a hole underneath McMahon Stadium and emerge with unprecedented flourish?
"Maybe,'' Ennis said with a chuckle. "It might be like Bugs Bunny when he pops up and says, 'Oh, I should have taken that left at Albuquerque ...
