For my Bostonians Friends......

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Received this from a Friend of mine, that Lives in the Boston Area.


[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]For those of you who have never been to "Bawstin", ( Boston )this is a good guideline. I hope you will consider coming to "Beantown" in the near future. [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]There's no school on School Street , no court on Court Street, no dock on Dock Square , no water on Water Street . Back Bay streets are in alphabetical "oddah" (order): Arlington , Berkeley , Clarendon, Dartmouth , etc. So are South Boston streets: [/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A, B, C, D, etc. If the streets are named after trees (e.g. Walnut, Chestnut, Cedar), you're on Beacon Hill . If they're named after poets, you're in Wellesley .
Massachusetts Avenue is Mass Ave ; Commonwealth Avenue is Comm Ave ;
[/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]South Boston[/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif] is Southie. The South End is the South End.
East Boston is Eastie. The North End is east of the former West End . The West End and Scollay Square are no more; a guy named Rappaport got rid of them one night. Roxbury is The Burry, Jamaica Plain is J.P.
[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]How to say these Massachusetts city names correctly:
**Say it wrong, be shunned**
[/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Worcester[/FONT][FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif] : Wuhsta (or Wistah)
Gloucester : Glaw sta
Leicester Lesta
Woburn : Woo ban
Dedham : Dead-um
Revere : Re -vee-ah
Quincy : Quinzee
Tewksbury : Tooks berry
Leominster : Lemin-sta
Peabody : Pee-ba-dee
Waltham : Walth-ham
Chatham : Chad dum
Samoset: Sam-oh-set or Sum-aw-set but nevah Summerset!

Definitions:
Frappes have ice cream, milkshakes don't.
If it is fizzy and flavored, it's tonic.
Soda is CLUB SODA.
"Pop" is DAD.
When we want Tonic WATER, we will ask for TONIC WATER.
The smallest beer is a pint.
Scrod is whatever they tell you it is, usually fish. If you paid more than $7/pound, you got scrod.
[/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]It's not a water fountain; it's a bubblah (bubbler).
It's not a trashcan; it's a barrel.
It's not a spucky, a hero or grinder,... it's a sub.
It's not a shopping cart; it's a carriage.
It's not a purse; it's a pockabook.
They're not franks; they're haht dahgs (hot dogs); Franks are money in Switzahland.

Police don't drive patrol units or black and whites they drive a "croo za". If you take the bus, your on the "looza crooza". It's not a rubber band, it's an elastic. It's not a traffic circle, it's a rotary. "Going to the islands" means Martha's Vineyard & Nantucket.

The Sox = The Red Sox
The C's = The Celtics
The B's = The Bruins
The Pat's =The Patriots
[/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Things not to do:

Don't pahk your cah in Hahvid Yahd .. they'll tow it to Meffa ( Medford ) or Summahville (Somerville) .
Don't sleep on the Common. ( Boston Common)
Don't wear Orange in Southie on St. Patrick's Day.

Things you should know:

There are two State Houses, two City Halls, two courthouses, two Hancock buildings
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[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif](one old, one new for each).

The colored lights on top the old Hancock tell the weatha':
[/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"Solid blue, clear view...."
"Flashing blue, clouds due...."
"Solid red, rain ahead...."
"Flashing red, snow instead...." - except in summer;
[/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]flashing red means the Red Sox game was rained out! [/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Most people live here all their life and still don't know what the hell is going on with this one:[/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Route 128 South is I-95 south. It's also I-93 north. [/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]The underground train is not a subway. It's the "T", and it doesn't run all night (fah chrysakes, this ain't Noo Yawk). [/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif][/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Order the "cold tea" in China Town after 2:00 am you'll get a kettle full of beer.
[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Bostonians.. . think that it's their God-given right to cut off someone in traffic.
Bostonians.. ...think that there are only 25 letters in the alphabet (no R's)
[/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]except in the word: "idea"(i dear). [/FONT]​
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Bostonians.. .think that three straight days of 90+ temperatures is a heat wave.
Bostonians.. .refer to six inches of snow as a "dusting."
Bostonians.. .always "bang a left" as soon as the light turns green, and oncoming traffic always expects it.
Bostonians.. .believe that using your turn signal is a sign of weakness.
Bostonians.. .think that 63-degree ocean water is warm.
Bostonians.. .think Rhode Island accents are annoying.
[/FONT]
 

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Most regions have their own speech inflections.

Don't yall rekon this thread is a knee slapper. I'mma gonna print it out and put it in my tow sack of jokes for next time I wanna kick up a ruckus with Yall.

Fuh-gedda-boud-dit this thread will crack em up up in Jerzee, it should get some laffs in the siddy to.

Joey: Hey Vinny, yew dewsh-bag. What-sup-witch-yew? Where-jew-go last night? Jew hang in Jerzee?

Vinny: Nah, I hung out in duh-siddy wid-dat chick Merry wit da Brooklyn ax-cent. Whad-jew-do?

Joey: Jew-bang-er?

Vinny: Nah, we just tawked.

Joey: why Yew gonna mairy er?

Vinny: What-da-fuk-issup-witch-yew? Fuh-gedda-boud-dit, man the chick got a brudda that would crush my noggin if he found out we was doin the deed.



wil..@):mad:
 

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"You from Jerzee?"
"Yeah"
"No shit, what exit"

My favorite Jersey joke, because it's so true.
Born in Jersey myself, grew up there, spent 8 years in Boston, without question one of the top three cities in the country.
Totally enjoyed my stay there. (worked for Amex at the time)

Only problem with Boston is last call is like at midnight, or was back in the 90's. What the fuck is that, Jerseyites don't even start until midnight.
 
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I just thought it was funny, coming from a Guy that was Born and Bred in Mass.

He lives in Salem Mass now, and he always jokes about his wife who was a Southie.... ( he came from the Other side * Good side whichever that is )

Met him & his wife on a Cruise a couple of years ago. Great Guy !! ( even though he's a Pats Fan ) LOL
I even had him sign-up here at the RX ( think his user name is Lilpup ) or something like that.
 

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good memories of cold tea on beech street following many hours of poker upstairs.
 

Conservatives, Patriots & Huskies return to glory
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"You from Jerzee?"
"Yeah"
"No shit, what exit"

My favorite Jersey joke, because it's so true.
Born in Jersey myself, grew up there, spent 8 years in Boston, without question one of the top three cities in the country.
Totally enjoyed my stay there. (worked for Amex at the time)

Only problem with Boston is last call is like at midnight, or was back in the 90's. What the fuck is that, Jerseyites don't even start until midnight.

that's funny and true

"what exit"

:lolBIG:
 

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This entire thread is hilarious, Born in the south shore of mass, moved to NJ when i was only 1 but moved back for a few years in grade school when parents got divorced. I still have a beach house right by Nantasket Beach, Work there in the summer. Boston is truly a great city, and the south shore is also a great place. Also great for striper fishing if anyone is into that!
 

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