Mr. Beisbol....Bake me a Lean!

Mr.Beisbol · Jul 29, 2010

(To the Tune of Mr. Sandman) Mr. Beisbol bake me those leans...make them the CUTEST, that I've ever seen. Give me two locks, with roses and cloverrrr, tell them all their days of losing are OVER...Beisbol...

That's my theme song ladies and mutts, and I'm here to help everyone more effectively enjoy the fruit and nectar of their labor. My babies (you, the people, the clients) take the morning train, they work from 9 til 5 and then they throw their cash on trap bets! It's time you make your money work for you. I've been on a crazy hot streak (8 straight winning days) and honestly I'm a humanitarian and I couldn't bear watching people suffer through losing night after losing night while I was grabbing a quick QUICK bite to eat at Cru on the Upper West Side (I summer in Maine, but often have to come back to Manhattan to meet with clients).

So, honestly, be one of the first in this downward pyramid scheme. You never want to jump on a bandwagon, be able to brag to your friends,,,"Oh yea, I've been following Mr. Beisbol since his arrival, you kidding me? You read his thoughts? How could you NOT be taking his plays...guess I've just got a little more genius in me than you". Picture yourself saying that, imagine it. It will soon be a reality. The units I say I am playing is what I am risking. 1 unit = 100 dollars. Max units on one game is 50.

TODAY'S CARD (Often I will have writeups, but no time today)

Rockies -1.5 runs (-150) 6 units

Tigers (+225) 3 units

Braves (-140) 8 units

Marlins (+138) 4 units

Phillies (-155) 4 units

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bamafan2112 · Jul 29, 2010

Welcome aboard and best of luck to you!

Mr.Beisbol · Jul 29, 2010

Rockies, Marlins, and Phillies win....Braves and Tigers lose

+1.1 units overall

Another winning day. Damn it feels good to be a lawyah

I hope some of you are saying, "Hey, look at that guy, I followed him day one and I won't stop until he loses". Those of you saying that are modern day Nostradamuses.

RoastedPoblano · Jul 30, 2010

Greetings from New Mexico Mr. Beisbol!!! I took every one of your convection oven plays and let me tell you they were baked just right. You must visit the desert and we can speak of great birds and eat mescalitos. I am happy to be on your team as Albuquerque does not have a major league team, but you sir are a professional. By the way, do you need any manual labor?

Gracias Cabron,

Roasted Poblano

Betallsports · Jul 30, 2010

Mr. Beisbol said:
(To the Tune of Mr. Sandman) Mr. Beisbol bake me those leans...make them the CUTEST, that I've ever seen. Give me two locks, with roses and cloverrrr, tell them all their days of losing are OVER...Beisbol...

That's my theme song ladies and mutts, and I'm here to help everyone more effectively enjoy the fruit and nectar of their labor. My babies (you, the people, the clients) take the morning train, they work from 9 til 5 and then they throw their cash on trap bets! It's time you make your money work for you. I've been on a crazy hot streak (8 straight winning days) and honestly I'm a humanitarian and I couldn't bear watching people suffer through losing night after losing night while I was grabbing a quick QUICK bite to eat at Cru on the Upper West Side (I summer in Maine, but often have to come back to Manhattan to meet with clients).

So, honestly, be one of the first in this downward pyramid scheme. You never want to jump on a bandwagon, be able to brag to your friends,,,"Oh yea, I've been following Mr. Beisbol since his arrival, you kidding me? You read his thoughts? How could you NOT be taking his plays...guess I've just got a little more genius in me than you". Picture yourself saying that, imagine it. It will soon be a reality. The units I say I am playing is what I am risking. 1 unit = 100 dollars. Max units on one game is 50.

TODAY'S CARD (Often I will have writeups, but no time today)

Rockies -1.5 runs (-150) 6 units

Tigers (+225) 3 units

Braves (-140) 8 units

Marlins (+138) 4 units

Phillies (-155) 4 units

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)^&&

Well-Seasoned · Jul 30, 2010

Roasted Poblano said:
Greetings from New Mexico Mr. Beisbol!!! I took every one of your convection oven plays and let me tell you they were baked just right. You must visit the desert and we can speak of great birds and eat mescalitos. I am happy to be on your team as Albuquerque does not have a major league team, but you sir are a professional. By the way, do you need any manual labor?

Gracias Cabron,

Roasted Poblano

Cabron LOL, I know it depends on the delivery

Mr.Beisbol · Jul 30, 2010

Today's Plays are as follows. I have a power lunch at Capital Grille in an hour so I must get these plays out now, because Lord only knows where I'll be at 7:00. Probably shit hammered in the Soho Grand with two hookers named Ebony and Ivory entertaining my clients and I.

Red Sox/Cardinals Parlay: 7 units to win 6 units

Lester and Carpenter are both pitching absolute dynamite right now and neither of their opponents really have any firepower to stop that. Both teams should roll

A's (-105) 4 units

Love Brett Anderson, think the kid is a big time talent and he has shown the ability numerous times to come right back to the big leagues from the DL or Triple A ball and perform. Dan Hudson is unproven and has shown some serious struggles with location. A's are always a patient hitting team and will likely have a ton of baserunners this game.

Phillies/Nats OVER 8 runs (-105) 8 units

Love this play, Oswalt's peripheral numbers this year have been quite deceiving, and playing in Houston (a pitcher's park) has helped as well. Don't see him doing very well througout the remainder of the year, he is certainly not the Phillies savior in my opinion. That being said, Phillies are on a tear and will mash Stammen, they may cover this number on their own. Easy money here.

Marlins (+127) 3 units

Marlins have been playing good ball and Volstad is a big power pitcher, the type that the Padres sometimes struggle with. I see value in this number.

FUTURES:

Oswalt ERA for remainder of the season OVER 3.42 (EVEN) 10 units

Mr.Beisbol · Aug 2, 2010

On Friday, went 2-2 and won 0.4 units

For the season I am 5-4, +1.5 units

Also, my Oswalt future is looking fabulous after 1 start. :dancefool

I have started off at a pedestrian rate, cooled off and yet I am still winning money. You know you can really do well in this industry when you are cold and still winning, just wait til I heat up. I had to take some clients to Babbo on Saturday and the Standard Grill on Sunday so I could not post. From now on I will try to make sure to post mobilely from my Droid Incredible if at all possible, I hate to keep my followers waiting up at night without any way of knowing whether the winning plays will eventually pop up on their screen. I'm sure several of you have already set up mobile alerts for any time Mr. Beisbol makes a post.

A few plays today that I feel really good about

Brewers 4 units (-115)

Gallardo been too good this year to have two bad starts in a row, the guy simply has electric stuff

Rays 4 units (-115)

Hellickson gets the call up and he has been absolutely dominating at the Triple A level this year, I expect that the major leaguers will have trouble adjusting to someone they haven't seen yet who can really pound the strike zone. I often like to play solid pitchers in their first couple starts since a call-up, and I won't stray from that strategy here.

Braves/Mets OVER 6.5 runs (-115) 8 units

Both Hudson and Santana's peripherals indicate they are pitching much worse than their stats this year. They have been lucky, and I feel as though these two lineups will hit the respective pitchers tonight. Braves bats have been very cold recently, but we all know the whole "cold streak" idea is a psychological phenomenon amongst we the viewers, not a fundamental or statistical reality. That being said, I feel as though we are getting some extra value from Vegas at this number in this game.

Mr.Beisbol · Aug 2, 2010

Just thought I'd check up on the faithful followers of this thread...how is everyone this afternoon? I just got done with a meeting with several important clients, we finished it off in style with Manhattans STRAIGHT with a twist of grenadine for everyone, even our secretaries got to enjoy the fruits of the labor.

While working I realized that both my jobs are labors of love, making sure my clients in the city are satisfied is my professional responsibility, making sure my followers on therx are satisfied is my entertainment responsibility, and I take both very seriously.

Throw down your paycheck that didn't go down the local watering hole last Friday on the OVER in the Bravos/Metropolitans game, then around 10:30 tonight you can skip your way to the local Wells Fargo for a nice little payday

Shooter60 · Aug 2, 2010

You don't seem to have the following you are looking for, maybe you should tone it up a bit... (sent from my Sprint EVO) Good luck to you.

Mr.Beisbol · Aug 2, 2010

As they always say, "if you build a trojan horse, they will come." Well that is exactly what I am doing, but instead of moron Persians escaping from my wooden horse, all that flows from it is molten value picks and winners. The following will grow like the hoard of pink mice babies which recently appeared in my son's pet mouse cage. We though the two adult mice were both females, but it turns out they must have been male and female and the male must have impregnated the shit out of the female because there are about 18 little pink critters the size of my thumbnail running around the cage. Soon enough the pinkies will be pregnant too, and the cage will be full of mice. The pink mice are like my followers here, only difference is sometimes the father mouse eats the little pink ones (only about 14 left now I think) whereas I would never eat or hurt my followers, I only want to help them. Also, eventually if enough mice get pregnant there will not be enough room for the mice and they will all starve...again the analogy fails because I would never let my followers starve or suffer, they will feast on winners like house wine in Sardinia and Sturgeon Caviar in Russia! The followers will come like the pink mice, because I will continue my winning ways

METFAN · Aug 2, 2010

MAYBE ANGELA JOLIE ADOPTED THE MICE FOR THE 2 FEMALES WHILE YOU WERE YACHTING WITH HER OFF THE COAST OF GREECE..

THEN AGAIN THE FACT THAT THEY WERE PINK WOULD INDICATE IT WAS PROBABLY ROSIE OR ELLEN AFTER SHE ASKED YOU TO REPACE HER AS THE NEW "IDOL" JUDGE

hno:

METFAN · Aug 2, 2010

Ps obviously you expect atlanta to score atleast 6..

Mr.Beisbol · Aug 2, 2010

I expect both teams to score a decent amount of runs, I know both offenses have been struggling but I really feel like Hudson has been walking on eggshells and playing with fire all year, sooner or later he will have to get cut and burnt, even if it is by the Mutt's bats

METFAN · Aug 2, 2010

the gutless woNders left 2 on in the first but fortunately for you..in the "BIGGEST GAME OF THE YR" SANTANA THE ACE GIVES UP 2 WALKS AND A 2 OUT BASES LOADED HIT TO RBI MACHINE ..RICK AKIEL" THEY MAKE ME...

ucking:

I'D RATHER CHANGE MY NAME TO ROCKIES OR NATIONALS FAN BY THIS STAGE

RoastedPoblano · Aug 2, 2010

Buenos tardes Mr. Beisbol! I followed again and despite losing the orange juice I am very pleased by your analysis of everything beisbol. This has been a tough year for mi familia and my thirteen children are tired and hungry. I tell them that food is more of a convenience than necessity and that makes them smile for awhile at least until they pass out from malnutrition. I nurse them with herbs and care until they are strong enough to come to work with me.

I have told my wife, Maria full of grace, of your wisdom and promises of fortune. She has given me the coffee can of $20 bills left to her by Uncle Favros many years ago. I am looking forward to the day when I may skip to the local Bank of the West with my sick children to open a checking account with my gifts from Mr. Beisbol. You are a family man I know this. The eagle told me as much on that cool, cool Sunday night. He told me you would protect the followers and if I followed you that one day I could become an eagle like him. If you are ever driving through the barren wasteland that is my home you must come by for tortas and warm Tecate. Mi familia believes in your strength and heroics.

Gracias Cabron,

Mr. Poblano

alyn · Aug 2, 2010

is Mr. Beisbol and Roasted Pablano the same guy.......sure seems like.LOL

RoastedPoblano · Aug 2, 2010

I can only speak for myself and mi familia when I say that I wish I was Mr. Beisbol. I think you mean Mr. Beisbol and the eagle are the same spirit (which I am convinced). Unless Mr. Beisbol is a rancher/taqueria cook/entrepreneur recycler/middle school beisbol coach/gas station clerk and lives in my cabin with thirteen deteriorating children and a recently acquired staff infection I can assure you we are different cabrons.

FelipeAugne · Aug 2, 2010

Agree with you Alyn...seems like he likes to hear himself talk.

Mr.Beisbol · Aug 2, 2010

I'm sorry for my first losing night my fellow countrymen in the battle against the books of Sin City. 2-1, but lost 1 unit...

7-5, + 0.5 units

I will continue to study the intricacies while I sip scotch (Glenlivet 21 year) on the weekdays. I can often be found on the roof of my apartment overlooking Central Park in the evening like a mad scientist going through sabermetric charts. I often stay in the city when working on high profile cases like the one I am working on now, it is simply more convenient. You'll find me on that roof all night tonight, I won't sleep easy having had my first losing night. :dancefool