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Thread: Ever Wonder Why California is so Broke?

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  1. #26  
    Honey Badger Don't Give A Shit barman's Avatar
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    Might have been THESE guys

    http://www.dewey-cheatham-howe.com/

    follow the sublinks within their home page for some decent Comedy
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  2. #27  
    Honey Badger Don't Give A Shit barman's Avatar
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    nm....Barman is on the case:

    ----------
    FIRM MEMBERS

    Myron Weasel
    Member since 1963

    Myron is the senior attorney in the firm, and has long been the face of our personal injury practice. He trained as an associate under Dickie Dewey Jr., son of the firm's founder. Myron provides decades of wisdom to our staff. While he still assists in marketing and client retention, he spends most of his time treating young female associates and paralegals to vacations in exotic locations as well as in local hourly motels. He's earned it.


    Jimmie Cochrane
    Member since 1982

    Jimmie heads the firm's criminal defense unit. Often mistaken for his late half-brother Johnnie, Jimmie actually invented the Chewbacca defense. After starting out on his own, he quickly recognized the greater revenue potential in representing wealthy clients and his deceptive talent helped him fit in well at Dewey Cheatham & Howe.


    Elizabeth "Betty" Dumpzer
    Member since 1985

    Betty heads our firm's divorce practice. She got her nickname in high school after a string of relationships ended badly. She took this to heart and turned it to her favor, marrying a string of wealthy men and taking their money after catching them with the hookers she secretly sent them. Myron Weasel was one of her victims. But instead of getting angry, he appreciated her talent and helped her find a home here at Dewey Cheatham and Howe. She is also the firm's head of Human Resources.
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  3. #28  
    Honey Badger Don't Give A Shit barman's Avatar
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    STAFF

    Some law firms hire clerical staff to make sure the paperwork on cases is in order, keep track of calendars, etc. We don't waste our resources like that. We hire the best prostitutes, drug dealers, and former cops we can find to smooth over any difficult situations that might come up in our cases.
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  4. #29  
    Honey Badger Don't Give A Shit barman's Avatar
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    LOBBYING

    Most people think of legislative representation as an honorable profession with a long history. At Dewey Cheatham & Howe, we reject such nonsense. Lobbying is all about getting government out of your way, and in the way of your rivals.

    Let's face it - governments are full of people who are fond of money, drugs, gambling, and whores, among other desires. We help our clients figure out which officials have the most influence and the greatest need. Through our connections in the appropriate service industries, we are able, at the right moment, to satisfy the wants and needs of critical people in the legislative and executive branches of government at the federal, state and local levels.
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  5. #30  
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    So much for the old adage: Honesty is the best policy.
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  6. #31  
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    [ State-funded scholarships and aid for illegal aliens going to state universities, wow what a brilliant idea for a state that is bankrupt ]

    Governor Jerry Brown Signs Second Half of California Dream Act


    Published October 09, 2011
    | Fox News Latino

    AP
    July 25: California Gov. Jerry Brown, right, signs AB 130 Dream Act bill on the back of Assemblyman Gil Cedillo, left, at the Mather Luther King Library at the Los Angeles City College in Los Angeles.

    Governor Jerry Brown announced Saturday that he has signed the second half of California's DREAM Act legislative package which allows undocumented immigrants to apply for state-funded scholarships and aid at state universities.
    AB131 by Assemblyman Gil Cedillo, D-Los Angeles, is the second half of the California Dream Act. Brown signed the first half of the package in July, which approved private scholarships and loans for students who are undocumented immigrants.
    Under current law, undocumented immigrant students who have graduated from a California high school and can prove they're on the path to legalize their immigration status can pay resident tuition rates. The bill would allow these students to apply for state aid.


    Related StoriesBrown Signs 1st Part of Calif. DREAM ActPerry Reaffirms Support for TX DREAM
    The contentious second half of the package requires that immigrant students meet the same requirements as all other students applying for financial aid at state universities but specifies that they only qualify for financial aid after all the other legal residents have applied.
    "The signing of now both parts of the California Dream Act will send a message across the country that California is prepared to lead the country with a positive and productive vision for how we approach challenging issues related to immigration," Cedillo said.
    The bills are different from the federal Dream Act, which includes a path to citizenship for the children of undocumented immigrants.
    Brown says the bill expands educational opportunities for all qualified students.
    "Going to college is a dream that promises intellectual excitement and creative thinking," Brown said. "The Dream Act benefits us all by giving top students a chance to improve their lives and the lives of all of us."
    Critics of the bills say it undermines immigration laws and encourages undocumented immigration by granting access to state resources reserved for legal residents. Many Republican lawmakers say legal students have had their grants cut in light of recent budget cuts to higher education.
    Assemblyman Tim Donnelly, R-Hesperia, said the bill's passage will the biggest mistake the Democratic Party makes.
    "The polling indicates that 80 to 90 percent of Californians are against this, and it crosses party lines," Donnelly said. He said he hopes to get a ballot initiative overturning the law started as soon as the bill is officially included in state statutes.
    "It is absolutely, fundamentally wrong and unfair and it is an insult to people who have worked and played by the rules, including those who have come to this country legally," he said.
    Ginny Rapini, coordinator for the NorCal Tea Party Patriots, said there should be consequences for undocumented immigrants and giving them an education funded by California taxpayers isn't fair to the legal residents who can't afford to pay for their own tuition.
    "What part of illegal do we not get? When people come here illegally they need to come here with the same rules and regulations that other people came here with," Rapini said.
    Supporters argue that children whose were brought to the U.S. illegally by their parents shouldn't be punished.
    The state Department of Finance estimates that 1 percent of all Cal Grant funds, the state student financial aid program, will be affected by the legislative package when it goes into effect in January 2013. The department says that 2,500 students would qualify for aid under the bill and estimates the costs to equal $14.5 million of a $1.4 billion program.
    Based on reporting by the Associated Press.



    Read more: http://latino.foxnews.com/latino/pol...#ixzz1aTyaKZ8J
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  7. #32  
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    [ Only in the liberal state of California, 6 yr old kid gets charged with sexual assault for brushing up against another kid while playing tag ]


    Hercules Family Battles Sex Assault Claim Against 6-Year-Old

    January 27, 2012 7:27 PM

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    The Lupine Hills Elementary School campus in Hercules. (CBS)


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    Local, News, Syndicated Local
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    Child, Crime, Hercules, Lupine Hills Elementary, Permanent Record, Playground, School, Sex Assault, Tag

    HERCULES (CBS 5) – An East Bay dad claims a game of tag on the playground resulted in his 6-year-old son being accused of sexual assault – a decision he said was an overreaction by school officials.
    The parent, who asked only to be identified as Oswin, said his son was accused of brushing his best friend’s leg or groin while the two were playing on the playground at Lupine Hills Elementary in Hercules two months ago.
    Oswin said his child was kept in the principal’s office for two hours until he confessed. He was suspended, and a sexual battery charge was placed on his permanent school record.
    “To me, I think it’s an overreaction,” said Marilyn Cheeks, a Lupine Hills Elementary parent
    Legally, there’s no such thing as sexual assault for a six year-old in California.
    It wasn’t until Oswin and his wife got a lawyer that the school backed off. District officials declined to discuss specifics. They did confirm that an investigation was conducted, and that the child could not be charged with sexual battery. The claim was removed from the boy’s record.
    Oswin’s son is attending another school now. He said he only hopes no one else will have to go through what his family did.
    (Copyright 2012 by CBS San Francisco. All Rights Reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.)


    http://sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com/201...st-6-year-old/
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  8. #33  
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    Los Angeles Times: ‘Undocumented’ Is Also Racist

    By Matthew Sheffield | May 02, 2013 | 10:31
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    Do you remember when the musician Prince changed his stage name to a symbol as a form of protest against his music label? Since no one could pronounce it, he was generally referred to as “the artist formerly known as Prince” in the press.
    The immigration debate took a similar absurd turn yesterday thanks to the Los Angeles Times which announced to the world that it would not only cease referring to people who had violated American immigration laws as “illegal immigrants,” it would also refrain from using the latest politically correct term “undocumented” to describe them as well.
    Perhaps this was inevitable given the fact that trying to use the word undocumented to refer to someone who overstayed a visa is clearly inaccurate. There are, in fact, documents that prove the individual in question came to this country at some point.
    “The alternative suggested by the 1995 guidelines, ‘undocumented immigrants,’ similarly falls short of our goal of precision,” the paper admitted in a memo released to employees.
    But rather than take the easy way out and use the fully accurate term “illegal immigrant,” the Times has decided to favor circumlocution instead:
    In covering both individuals and groups, the goal is to provide relevance and context and to avoid labels.
    Use the term "illegal immigration" to describe the phenomenon of entering or residing in a country in violation of the law.
    Avoid using "illegal immigrant" or "undocumented immigrant" to describe individuals except when necessary in direct quotations. [...]
    Be specific whenever possible in describing an individual’s status:

    • "Authorities said he crossed the border illegally."
    • "She entered the country to attend college but overstayed her student visa."
    • "He was brought here as a child by his parents, who entered the U.S. without a visa."
    While the policy was stated formally yesterday, as the Times’s ombudsman noted, the paper has already been following this practice for some time. There is also a full copy of the memo at the link if you wish to read it.
    In the announcement, the Times admitted that the terminology change was made after the Associated Press banned its writers from referring to people in the country against the law as “illegal immigrants” last month.


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  9. #34  
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    California Delivers Free Condoms to 12-Year-Olds


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    by William Bigelow 4 May 2013 473 post a comment
    Middle-school California kids, now you can be as sexually profligate as you want to be--and your parents don’t even have to know about it! The California Condom Access Project, run by the California Health Council, which is making condoms available for kids as young as 12 in an online, taxpayer-funded condom delivery service, has expanded their service to include San Diego and Fresno counties.

    But it gets better if you keep secrets from your parents. If you visit this website, as many as 10 free condoms can be delivered in confidential packaging, along with lubricant and educational materials. And in California, teens don’t need parental consent to buy contraceptives.

    Among 15-19 year-olds, San Diego County ranks second in chlamydia cases in California, and ranks sixth in gonorrhea cases. The state is rampant with STDs; syphilis cases zoomed 18% from 2010 to 2011, Chlamydia rose 5% and gonorrhea rose 1.5%.

    The news of the expanded program follows Tuesday’s announcement by the FDA of their approval of sale of the morning-after pill to girls as young as 15.

    Amy Moy, vice president of public affairs of the California Family Health Council said, "It's really important that we all share with youth in our lives that abstinence is the most effective way to avoid sexually transmitted infection and unintended pregnancy. But we know that teens are engaging in sexual activity, and we just want to help them be as safe as possible and not keep our heads in the sand and pretend there isn't a problem."
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  10. #35  
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    Zit I don't think the site is encouraging 12 year olds to fuck. Proof of that is below. See the first two links:
    http://www.teensource.org/ts/blog

    What the site encourages young kids to do if they're going to fuck is to protect themselves from pregnancy and diseases. Should it be taxpayer funded? I don't know. Does it cost the taxpayers more in the long run if these kids have more babies, or spread aids or gonorrhea?

    This whole "free condoms" thing is more indicative of a societal problem with no solution. Girls are reaching sexual maturity earlier than ever now. And even the ugly ones can get laid. A 15 year old girl at home with a baby will cost the taxpayers more than a box of condoms. You have a right to be appalled. But at whom?
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  11. #36  
    Conservatives, Patriots & Huskies return to glory Willie99's Avatar
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    I don't wonder, CA is the capital on libtard nation

    they want to bring the magic of the south side of Chicago and the magic of CA to the rest of the world

    why do libtards think the laws they espouse are the solution, ignoring results like the south side of Chicago and CA? They be what they be, they're our cross to carry throughout our life

    the lord works in mysterious ways

    just think, if everyone was a libtard, how fucked up would we be?

    we're here for a reason my friend, we're their salvation
    "The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter". Winston Churchill "A rising tide raises all boats". JFK
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  13. #38  
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    [ Liberals doing a great job here ]

    California in the red by $127.2 billion, state auditors say


    -
    The Washington Times
    Monday, April 1, 2013





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    A financial report issued by state auditors finds that the state of California is in the red by an unsustainable $127.2 billion.

    The report says that the state’s negative status increased that year, largely because it spent $1.7 billion more than it received in revenues and wound up with an accumulated deficit of just under $23 billion in fiscal year 2011-2012, the Sacramento Bee stated.
    Gov. Jerry Brown has referred to the deficit and other budget gaps, mostly money owed to schools, as a “wall of debt” totaling more than $30 billion, the Sacramento Bee reported.
    About half of the deficit came from the state issuing general obligation bonds and then giving the money to local governments and school districts for public works projects. The report listed California’s long-term obligations at $167.9 billion, nearly half of which ($79.9 billion) were in general obligation bonds, with another $30.8 billion in revenue bonds, the Sacramento Bee reported.

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  15. #40  
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    The California acupuncture board saved my life
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  16. #41  
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    Quote Originally Posted by festeringZit View Post
    You know this woman is fucked up when the 15th dumbest thing she said was "bush admin is good".....usually that takes number 1 slot.
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  17. #42  
    in your heart, you know i'm right blue edwards's Avatar
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    Highest state income tax in the country...and broke as a mother fucker
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  18. #43  
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    Nothing more government spending can't fix.
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  19. #44  
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    .1% of the population is "transgenedered." That is 1/1000 at best. But, kooky California has to make sure these f'ed up kids' rights trump
    everyone else's rights. I'm sure teenage girls will love having some guy in their bathroom/locker-room that thinks he's really a girl.



    As 2014 is just a day away, new laws have been crafted for Californians to adhere to. Here are just a few blessed laws and regulations that will come into effect in 2014:

    Transgender Rights: We will all sleep a little better at night knowing that students in grades K-12 who identify as transgender will be able to use the school bathrooms of their choosing as long as it is “consistent with their gender identity,” even if it is different than their gender at birth. Students will also be able to select whether they want to be on the boys team or the girls team based on their “gender identity.”
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  20. #45  
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    Quote Originally Posted by festeringZit View Post
    .1% of the population is "transgenedered." That is 1/1000 at best. But, kooky California has to make sure these f'ed up kids' rights trump
    everyone else's rights. I'm sure teenage girls will love having some guy in their bathroom/locker-room that thinks he's really a girl.



    As 2014 is just a day away, new laws have been crafted for Californians to adhere to. Here are just a few blessed laws and regulations that will come into effect in 2014:

    Transgender Rights: We will all sleep a little better at night knowing that students in grades K-12 who identify as transgender will be able to use the school bathrooms of their choosing as long as it is “consistent with their gender identity,” even if it is different than their gender at birth. Students will also be able to select whether they want to be on the boys team or the girls team based on their “gender identity.”
    Progressive thinking at it's finest.
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  21. #46  
    Conservatives, Patriots & Huskies return to glory Willie99's Avatar
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    do I ever wonder why CA is broke? nope, it's painfully obvious
    "The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter". Winston Churchill "A rising tide raises all boats". JFK
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  22. #47  
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scott L View Post
    Zit I don't think the site is encouraging 12 year olds to fuck. Proof of that is below. See the first two links:
    http://www.teensource.org/ts/blog

    What the site encourages young kids to do if they're going to fuck is to protect themselves from pregnancy and diseases. Should it be taxpayer funded? I don't know. Does it cost the taxpayers more in the long run if these kids have more babies, or spread aids or gonorrhea?

    This whole "free condoms" thing is more indicative of a societal problem with no solution. Girls are reaching sexual maturity earlier than ever now. And even the ugly ones can get laid. A 15 year old girl at home with a baby will cost the taxpayers more than a box of condoms. You have a right to be appalled. But at whom?
    The radical regressive left, that's who.

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  23. #48  
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    [ So... this guy is going to be sworn in as a lawyer, to uphold the law, constitution... etc - but he's a fucking illegal alien. This country is so fucked. If the law is wrong, change the law, don't capriciously decide to not enforce it. ]

    California grants law license to illegal immigrant

    Published January 02, 2014Associated Press


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    SAN FRANCISCO – The California Supreme Court granted a law license Thursday to a man who has lived in the U.S. illegally for two decades, a ruling that advocates hope will open the door to millions of immigrants seeking to enter other professions such as medicine, accounting and teaching.
    The unanimous decision means Sergio Garcia, who attended law school and passed the state bar exam while working in a grocery store and on farms, can begin practicing law immediately.
    It's the latest in a string of legal and legislative victories for people who are in the country without permission. Other successes include the creation of a path to citizenship for many young people and the granting of drivers licenses in some states.
    "This is a bright new day in California history and bodes well for the future," the Coalition for Humane Immigrant Rights of Los Angeles said in a statement.
    The court sided with state officials in the case, which pitted them against the White House over a 1996 federal law that bars people who are in the U.S. illegally from receiving professional licenses from government agencies or with the use of public money, unless state lawmakers vote otherwise.
    Bill Hing, a law professor at the University of San Francisco, said the court made clear the only reason it granted Garcia's request is that California recently approved a law that specifically authorizes the state to give law licenses to immigrants who are here illegally.
    The new law, inspired by Garcia's situation, took effect Wednesday.
    It was unclear how many people would qualify to practice law under the ruling and whether it would influence other states. Legislatures and governors in more conservative states such as Alabama and Arizona are likely to be less receptive to the idea.
    Garcia, who plans to be a personal injury attorney in his hometown of Chico, said he hoped the decision would serve as a "beacon of hope" to others in the same situation.
    He "can hang up a shingle and be his own company," said Hing, who represented the state bar association in the case. "Once he does that, a client can retain him as a lawyer."
    But some questions remained unresolved, such as whether Garcia can appear in federal court or in other states. Federal law makes it illegal for law firms to hire him.
    Chief Justice Tani Cantil-Sakauye, who wrote the opinion, said the new state law removed any barrier to Garcia's quest for a license. And no other federal statute "purports to preclude a state from granting a license to practice law to an undocumented immigrant," Cantil-Sakauye wrote.
    Garcia, 36, arrived in the U.S. as a teenager to pick almonds with his father, who was a permanent legal resident. His father filed a petition in 1994 seeking an immigration visa for his son. It was accepted in 1995, but because of the backlog of visa applications from people from Mexico, Garcia has never received a visa number.
    He applied for citizenship in 1994 and is still working toward that goal.
    The U.S. Department of Justice argued that Garcia was barred from receiving his law license because the court's entire budget comes from the public treasury, a violation of the federal mandate that no public money be used to grant licenses to people who are in the country without permission.
    Assistant U.S. Attorney Daniel Tenney, who argued the case, did not immediately return a call seeking comment.
    The Obama administration's position in the case came as a surprise to some, since the White House has shielded from deportation people who were brought to the U.S. illegally as children, provided they also graduated from high school, kept a clean criminal record and met other conditions.
    At a hearing in September, a majority of the state Supreme Court justices appeared reluctant to grant Garcia the license under current state and federal law, saying they were prohibited from doing so unless the Legislature acted.
    Garcia worked in the fields and at a grocery store before attending community college. He then became a paralegal, went to law school and passed the bar exam on his first try. His effort to get licensed was supported by state bar officials and California's attorney general, who argued that citizenship is not a requirement to receive a California law license.
    Two other similar cases are pending in Florida and New York, and the Obama administration has made it clear it will oppose bar entry to immigrants unless each state passes its own laws allowing the practice, Hing said.
    California Attorney General Kamala Harris supported Garcia's petition and applauded the ruling.
    Nick Pacilio, a spokesman for Harris, said California's success "has hinged on the hard work and self-sufficiency of immigrants like Sergio."
    Thursday's decision is the latest example of changes in immigration policy happening at the state level while an effort to achieve a broad federal overhaul stalls in the House.
    California and nine other states last year agreed to grant drivers licenses to people in the country illegally, bringing the total to 13 states, according to the National Conference of State Legislatures. Nevada and Maryland began taking applications this week.
    Four states -- Colorado, Minnesota, Oregon and New Jersey -- last year offered in-state college tuition to residents who are here illegally, joining California and 10 others.
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  24. #49  
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    Quote Originally Posted by festeringZit View Post
    [ So... this guy is going to be sworn in as a lawyer, to uphold the law, constitution... etc - but he's a fucking illegal alien. This country is so fucked. If the law is wrong, change the law, don't capriciously decide to not enforce it.
    Well, if the Kenyan can get away with it...
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  25. #50  
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sheriff Joe View Post
    Well, if the Kenyan can get away with it...
    Bingo.
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