Dudes,
A week ago I shoveled not just a loser of a post, but felt a strap-on leaving fat aficionados with little to chew on when the Yankees were done with me. It's one thing to lose a posted selection, it's just a different abyss when the bitch blowing you is nothing more than a pit bull treating your sausage loaf like a fucking chew toy. So that's the way I felt, my apologies.
Time passes, and what have we all learned? The Yankees and their payroll once again will be watching the Series from their TVs, the Phillies slingers are human and were defeated. The Tampons had a great run to finish their season and the Snakes reached the postseason without the services of a couple of Swordsmen named Johnson and Schilling.
And then there were 4. Make no mistake, I have nothing against any remaining team, and nor do I claim a favorite. While the National League enjoys an off day at that certain Asian Massage Parlor outside of St. Louis, Motown gears up for the return of their Kitties. While I've never been one to trade my dignity for a healthy batch of my man chowder conveniently painting a hungry chicks esophagus, I must give credit where it's due, and to the Tigers for downing my Yankees. Michigan is the place to be right now for great sports.
The numbers game. Colby Lewis squares off against Doug Fister. Before I get into these slingers, I wanna remove the chastity belt that supports the goods of the team numbers. The Rangers and Tigers are 2 clubs which mirror one another from top to bottom on offense. At Vendor headquarters, the Meat database has no clear cut outcome, just slight edges for both teams. Not enough to really qualify for making a post. Yet, here I am making one, not just for the fuck of it, but it's what else gets plugged. NOTE: as a PSA, numbers aren't the only thing that gets plugged at my headquarters, it's essential strictly for capping purposes, that assorted chicks need to be hungrily huffing on my Eddie Jr. like a couple of starving weasels to make the process come full circle.
A return to serenity with the gunslingers. While Lewis has had a decent season, Fister ended with a losing record. Here's the difference, Mr. Fister can clearly reflect back on his Seamen jaunt and say "I Doug my own grave." While it's evident Eric Wedge is a fucking loser, his pitching staff was not. In fact, what The Meat Vendor Database spits out like a college freshman giving her first blowjob, is the fact that since "The Fist" became a Motor City Kitty, he went 8-1 during the regular season and lowered his ERA by a half run. Another nut in his pitching orgy also has this fucker undefeated at home as a Tiger. This cocksman has also generated quality after quality start averaging 7 innings.
On August 3, in his first start for Detroit, Fister notched a win against these Rangers, only this time, he got the run support he couldn't get playing in Seattle with a pussy lineup.
During the Playoffs, when 70% has been on the side of a game, it hasn't lost either. Odd but true, I am the numbers guru that fucks for money so trust me.
Doug Fister or "The Fist" I'm certain could be mistaken as Boy Beef as he uses all 5 fingers as a Ranger butt plug to void their offense.
9* Five Finger Gash Engulfer on Doug "The Fist" Fist-Her and the Detroit Tigers tonight
A week ago I shoveled not just a loser of a post, but felt a strap-on leaving fat aficionados with little to chew on when the Yankees were done with me. It's one thing to lose a posted selection, it's just a different abyss when the bitch blowing you is nothing more than a pit bull treating your sausage loaf like a fucking chew toy. So that's the way I felt, my apologies.
Time passes, and what have we all learned? The Yankees and their payroll once again will be watching the Series from their TVs, the Phillies slingers are human and were defeated. The Tampons had a great run to finish their season and the Snakes reached the postseason without the services of a couple of Swordsmen named Johnson and Schilling.
And then there were 4. Make no mistake, I have nothing against any remaining team, and nor do I claim a favorite. While the National League enjoys an off day at that certain Asian Massage Parlor outside of St. Louis, Motown gears up for the return of their Kitties. While I've never been one to trade my dignity for a healthy batch of my man chowder conveniently painting a hungry chicks esophagus, I must give credit where it's due, and to the Tigers for downing my Yankees. Michigan is the place to be right now for great sports.
The numbers game. Colby Lewis squares off against Doug Fister. Before I get into these slingers, I wanna remove the chastity belt that supports the goods of the team numbers. The Rangers and Tigers are 2 clubs which mirror one another from top to bottom on offense. At Vendor headquarters, the Meat database has no clear cut outcome, just slight edges for both teams. Not enough to really qualify for making a post. Yet, here I am making one, not just for the fuck of it, but it's what else gets plugged. NOTE: as a PSA, numbers aren't the only thing that gets plugged at my headquarters, it's essential strictly for capping purposes, that assorted chicks need to be hungrily huffing on my Eddie Jr. like a couple of starving weasels to make the process come full circle.
A return to serenity with the gunslingers. While Lewis has had a decent season, Fister ended with a losing record. Here's the difference, Mr. Fister can clearly reflect back on his Seamen jaunt and say "I Doug my own grave." While it's evident Eric Wedge is a fucking loser, his pitching staff was not. In fact, what The Meat Vendor Database spits out like a college freshman giving her first blowjob, is the fact that since "The Fist" became a Motor City Kitty, he went 8-1 during the regular season and lowered his ERA by a half run. Another nut in his pitching orgy also has this fucker undefeated at home as a Tiger. This cocksman has also generated quality after quality start averaging 7 innings.
On August 3, in his first start for Detroit, Fister notched a win against these Rangers, only this time, he got the run support he couldn't get playing in Seattle with a pussy lineup.
During the Playoffs, when 70% has been on the side of a game, it hasn't lost either. Odd but true, I am the numbers guru that fucks for money so trust me.
Doug Fister or "The Fist" I'm certain could be mistaken as Boy Beef as he uses all 5 fingers as a Ranger butt plug to void their offense.
9* Five Finger Gash Engulfer on Doug "The Fist" Fist-Her and the Detroit Tigers tonight